October 26, 1768 — to His Parents

BEFORE COMING TO AMERICA

October 26, 1768 - August 27, 1771

CHAPTER 1

This is the first Asbury letter which has come to light. He was still in England, and it was written to his parents to inform them of his removal from the Colchester Circuit to Wiltshire. His mother had evidently grieved greatly because of his leaving home. He admonishes her not to mourn. The most interesting thing in the letter is his reference to Nancy Brookes. Because he was a bachelor, it has been rather taken for granted that he was never interested in any woman. However, it would appear here that he had been. He was twenty-three years of age when this letter was written. In this letter he shows much of the burden for souls which characterized his ministry.

WILTSHIRE, ENGLAND

October 26, 1768

[TO HIS PARENTS]¹

My dearly beloved in the Lord and also Parents Dear:

Being moved from the place I was in, I think it my duty to let you know and I hope you will not repine or be uneasy. I am now in health and strength and very well contented, settled upon my good behaviour in Wiltshire. There are two preachers of us in the round. We have many places and in general a loving good natured people, so I see nothing to complain of; there is no want of any thing, for our bread and water are sure, only there is a great want in me of wisdom and grace for the work; but I hope my God will supply all my wants. We spend our Sundays at Portsmouth and Salisbury; there we have two large congregations and very large and good preaching houses. I had no choice this year, and now I think I am as well settled as I could desire. As to temporals, that is the least of my cares. If my heart is upright I shall not want them I am sure. I hope, my dear Mother, you are more easy. Why will you mourn in such a manner? If you have given me to the Lord let it be a free will offering, and don’t grieve for me. I have cause to be thankful that such a poor, ignorant, foolish, unfaithful, unfruitful creature should be called to the work, chosen of man, and I hope and trust, of God; though I have done enough to both to cast me off for ever.

I wonder some times how anyone will sit to hear me, but the Lord covers my weakness with his power. I trust you will be easy and more quiet. As for me, I know what I am called to. It is to give up all, and to have my hands and heart in the work, yea the nearest and dearest friends. And I am content and will do it. Nay, it is done. Christ is all to me. Let others condemn me, as being without natural affection, as being stubborn, disobedient to parents, or say what they please. It does not alter the case, for it is a small matter with me to be judged of man. I love my parents and friends but I love my God better and his service, because it is perfect freedom, and he does not send me away at my own cost, for he gives me to prove, as my day is, my strength is, and it is my meat and drink to do his will. And tho I have given up all I do not repent, for I have found all. I saw Mr. Pawson² at Stroud. He seems like a loving agreeable young man, sensible and understanding in the things of God. Give my love to him. Do tell Mr. Pawson to tell Mr. King where I am, and the people at Broadmarston, and any others to direct to me at the new chapel house in Salisbury. There you must direct. I am in very good health. Nancy Brookes,³ your manner of speaking made me to begin to think and wonder. I know very well that it becomes me to be without partiality and if you or any other will convince me of it I would be ashamed of it, and shake it off as I would the mire of the streets. I don’t say but I may be guilty of it, but I do not know wherein and in regard to what [?] passed when I was over at Barr, I can’t tell wherein, and it is a pity, but you had told me or would do it. My time was short. I was with all the people but you, I think, and also I was at your house but you were not at home. I could [have] been as glad of your company as any one at Barr, and wanted it but could not have it, but my dear heart, I shall think no more of it if you don’t, tho it gave me some little pain. For who is offended, and I burn not. Dear child I have travailed in birth for you and never sought any⁴ —— God is my witness, but his glory and your good. And tho you have ten thousand instructors in Christ, you have not many fathers, for in Christ I have begotten you to a lively hope. My dear child, I am jealous over you with a godly jealousy, lest as the serpent beguiled Eve, you should be drawn from the simplicity of the gospel.

Watch and pray and pray for me and all will be well, dear father. I hope you love and cleave to Jesus. Have you victory over sin and that which has in time past most easily beset you? Oh dear father, labour to increase as with more of God, to be holy and without blame before him in love. Sister Smith you have many trials, one upon the back of another, but you can’t trust. Set up your Ebenezer and say hitherto the Lord has helped you, and he will if you look to him in every trial, and help you to keep your garments always white. Oh child contend for this. Don’t give it up, sooner give up your life than this. I do and will affirm that the blood of Jesus cleanses from all sin, and if no one will stand with me I will stand alone. I was not taught it of man nor you either. If He was a man He might make us give it up, but the work is the Lord’s. Oh live by faith in the Son of God every moment, and he will make way for you through the water and fire in all our temptation. Help keep us to prove his utmost salvation, his fulness of love. Pray, pray, watch and pray.

Friend Thomas Smith where are you? Yet out of Christ, host to Christ, shake yourself from the dust, arise and fly to Jesus, the City of refuge. Make haste my dear friend, make haste, the avenger of blood is at your heels. Oh cry earnestly and instantly, “Jesus thou Son of David have mercy on me.”

Now Moley Sheldon also, there is nothing but complaining in your streets and maybe you are ready to say, ——⁵ I doubt there never will be a child, your like, the woman with the bloody issue that spent all she had and now no better, —— But you perhaps have no spirit, —— or else you would fall upon Jesus, the last shift when you are lost under —— as in yourself. Then you will submit to come to Jesus and pray like her from behind, but if it is with this, if I may but touch him, I shall be well. Oh may you be driven by extreme want to Him and fall nigh.

To my friend Sheldon, Oh my dear heart where are you, tossed like a ship upon the ocean, here and there, but no rest. Return to Jesus weeping —— ⁶ to Him and give a devorce to your sins. He will receive you and comfort you with a sense of his love. See the Harbour, make for it notwithstanding it is high. He may put forth his hand as he did to Peter and save you if you reflect on Jesus. You cannot help but love him, but you may say, my heart is worldly, hard and unfeeling. He shall maybe this moment cast a look, melt it into love, thy love, thy flinty heart shall turn and get it. See the victory, Mrs. Brookes. Do you find comfort in Jesus and stay your soul on Him? You may answer to this but I am very weak and the world follows and sticks close. Look to the strong for strength, He the Lord will free you from this plague of earth this moment. Oh cry to your God this moment.

To Mother Perkins, do you love Jesus? Do you increase with the increase of God? If so watch and pray and go home and prosper.

To Betty Willkes, are you following the humble Nazarene, Jesus the joy and desire of the whole Christ above and below? Oh go on, pray and watch, and hate the thing that is evil, and God, even you have God, shall give you his blessing and care for your soul and body.

To Sarah Weston, I hope it will be given you to go on through evil report and good and be a faithful follower of the Lamb which your soul wishes and desires and prays for you, my dear heart. We must learn to look from persons and things to the immovable, unchangeable God. He is a rock and his work is perfect. My love to John. I wish and desire and pray that he may have repentance and remission of sins, that both your souls may be bound up in the bundle of life. Farewell and prosper and that you may pray much.

To Sally Brookes, I hope to hear, dear child, that your hard heart is broken and that the hand of God presses your love, that you give up every vanity, over you be love and be wedded to the king’s son and be brought into the banqueting house and his banner. That you must not expect me to write very often, it is so far, send me a letter quick.

Remember to tell Mr. Pawson you need only direct for me at the Chapel House in Salisbury. I cannot by any means come over till the Conference, so you must not desire it, but I hope to see you then. I think if I can to go to the Leeds Conference, it will be in my way, these from, F. ASBURY

Drew University Library