1741

The bodies of Anne Cole and Elizabeth Davis were buried. I preached before the burial, on, “Blessed are the dead which die in the Lord: Even so saith the Spirit; for they rest from their labors, and their works do follow them.” Sometime after Elizabeth Davis was speechless, being desired to hold up her hand, if she knew she was going to God, she looked up, and immediately holden up both her hands. On Wednesday, I had asked Anne Cole, whether she chose to live or die. She said, “I do not choose either: I choose nothing. I am in my Savior’s hands; and I have no will but his. Yet I know, he will restore me soon.” And so he did, in a few hours, to the paradise of God.

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I showed the absolute necessity of “forgetting the things that are behind,” whether works, sufferings, or gifts, if we would “press toward the mark for the prize of our high calling.” In the evening, all the Bands being present, both of Bristol and Kingswood, I simply related what God had done by me, for them of Kingswood in particular; and what return many of them had made, for several months last past, by their continual disputes, divisions, and offenses; causing me to go heavily all the day long.

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I found another believer, patiently waiting for the salvation of God; desiring neither health, not ease, nor life, nor death; but only that His will should be done.

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I expounded the twenty-third Psalm; and many were led forth by the waters of comfort: Two especially, who never knew till then, that their “iniquities were forgiven and their sin covered.”

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I met with a surprising instance of the power of the devil. While we were at the room, Mrs. J——s, sitting at home, took the Bible to read; but on a sudden threw it away, saying, “I am good enough; I will never read or pray more.” She was in the same mind when I came; often repeating, “I used to think I was full of sin, and that I sinned in every thing I did; but now I know better: I am a good Christian; I never did any harm in my life; I don’t desire to be any better than I am.” She spoke many things to the same effect, plainly showing, that the spirit of pride, and of lies, had the full dominion over her. Monday, 12. I asked, “Do you desire to be healed?” She said, “I am whole.” “But do you desire to be saved?” She replied, “I am saved; I ail nothing; I am happy.” Yet it was easy to discern, she was in the most violent agony, both of body and mind; sweating exceedingly, notwithstanding the severe frost, and not continuing in the same posture a moment. Upon our beginning to pray, she raged beyond measure; but soon sunk down as dead. In a few minutes she revived, and joined in prayer. We left her for the present in peace.

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In the evening our souls were so filled with the spirit of prayer and thanksgiving, that I could scarce tell how to expound, till I found where it is written, “My song shall be always of the loving-kindness of the Lord. With my mouth will I ever be showing thy truth, from one generation to another.”

All this day, Mrs. J——s was in a violent agony, till, starting up in the evening, she said, “Now they have done. They have just done. C—— prayed, and Humphreys preached.” (And indeed so they did.) “And they are coming hither as fast as they can.” Quickly after they came in. She immediately cried out, “Why, what do you come for? You can’t pray. You know you can’t.” And they could not open their mouths; so that, after a short time, they were constrained to leave her as she was. Many came to see her on Tuesday; — to every one of whom she spoke, concerning either their actual or their heart sins, and that so closely, that several of them went away in more haste than they came. In the afternoon Mr. J—— sent to Kingswood for me. She told him, “Mr. Wesley won’t come tonight; he will come in the morning. But God has begun, and he will end the work by himself. Before six in the morning I shall be well.” And about a quarter before six the next morning, after lying quiet awhile, she broke out, “Peace be unto thee;” (her husband;) “peace be unto this house. The peace of God is come to my soul. I know that my Redeemer liveth.” And for several days her mouth was filled with His praise, and her “talk was wholly of his wondrous works.”

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I went to one of our brothers, who, being (as was supposed) struck with death, was rejoicing with joy unspeakable. His mouth overflowed with praise, and his eyes with tears, in hope of going soon to Him he loved.

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I found, from several accounts, it was absolutely necessary for me to be at London. I therefore desired the society to meet in the evening; and having settled things in the best manner I could, on Tuesday set out, and on Wednesday evening met our brethren at the Foundery.

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I began expounding where my brother had left off, viz., at the fourth chapter of the first Epistle of St. John. He had not preached the morning before; nor intended to do it any more. “The Philistines are upon thee, Samson.” But the Lord is not “departed from thee.” He shall strengthen thee yet again, and thou shalt be “avenged of them for the loss of thy eyes.”

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I enforced that great command, “As we have opportunity, let us do good unto all men:” And in the evening, those solemn words, “Take heed, brethren, lest there be in any of you an evil heart of unbelief, in departing from the living God.”

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Our old friends, Mr. Gambold and Mr. Hall, came to see my brother and me. The conversation turned wholly on silent prayer, and quiet waiting for God; which, they said, was the only possible way to attain living, saving faith.

Sirenum voces, et Circes pocula nosti?¹

Was there ever so pleasing a scheme? But where is it written? Not in any of those books which I account the Oracles of God. I allow, if there is a better way to God than the scriptural way, this is it. But the prejudice of education so hangs upon me, that I cannot think there is. I must therefore still wait in the Bible way, from which this differs as light from darkness.

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I preached in the morning, on, “Then shall they fast in those days;” and in the afternoon spent a sweet hour in prayer with some hundreds of our society.

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A private letter, wrote to me by Mr. Whitefield, having been printed without either his leave or mine, great numbers of copies were given to our people, both at the door and in the Foundery itself. Having procured one of them, I related (after preaching) the naked fact to the congregation, and told them, “I will do just what I believe Mr. Whitefield would were he here himself.” Upon which I tore it in pieces before them all. Every one who had received it, did the same. So that in two minutes there was not a whole copy left. Ah! poor Ahithophel! Ibi omnis effusus laborf35

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Being the general Fast-Day, I preached in the morning on those words, “Shall I not visit for these things, saith the Lord? Shall not my son be avenged on such a nation as this?” Coming from the service at St. Luke’s, I found our house so crowded, that the people were ready to tread one upon another. I had not designed to preach; but seeing such a congregation, I could not think it right to send them empty away; and therefore expounded the parable of the barren fighter. O that it may at length bear fruit!

From hence I went to Deptford, where many poor wretches were got together, utterly void both of common sense and common decency. They cried aloud, as if just come from “among the tombs:” But they could not prevail against the Holy One of God. Many of them were altogether confounded, and, I trust, will come again with a better mind.

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(Being Shrove-Tuesday.) Before I began to preach, many men of the baser sort, having mixed themselves with the women, behaved so indecently, as occasioned much disturbance. A Constable commanded them to keep the peace: In answer to which they knocked him down. Some who were near seized on two of them, and, by shutting the doors, prevented any farther contest. Those two were afterwards carried before a Magistrate; but on their promise of better behavior, were discharged.

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My brother returned from Oxford, and preached on the true way of waiting for God: Thereby dispelling at once the fears of some, and the vain hopes of others; who had confidently affirmed that Mr. Charles Wesley was still already, and would come to London no more.

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While I was preaching in Long-Lane, the host of the aliens gathered together: And one large stone (many of which they threw) went just over my shoulder. But no one was hurt in any degree: For thy “kingdom ruleth over all.”

All things now being settled according to my wish, on Tuesday, 17, I left London. In the afternoon I reached Oxford, and leaving my horse there, set out on foot for Stanton-Harcourt. The night overtook me in about an hour, accompanied with heavy rain. Being wet and weary, and not well knowing my way, I could not help saying in my heart, (though ashamed of my want of resignation to God’s will,) O that thou wouldest “stay the bottles of heaven;” or, at least, give me light, or an honest guide, or some help in the manner thou knowest! Presently the rain ceased; the moon broke out, and a friendly man overtook me, who set me upon his own horse, and walked by my side, till we came to Mr. Gambold’s door.

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I walked on to Burford; on Thursday to Malmsbury; and the next day to Bristol. Saturday, 21. I inquired, as fully as I could, concerning the divisions and offenses which, notwithstanding the earnest cautions I had given, began afresh to break out in Kingswood. In the afternoon I met a few of the Bands there; but it was a cold uncomfortable meeting. Sunday,

22. I endeavored to show them the ground of many of their mistakes, from those words, “Ye need not that any man teach you, but as that same anointing teacheth you;” — a text which had been frequently brought in support of the rankest enthusiasm. Mr. Cennick, and fifteen or twenty others, came up to me after sermon. I told them they had not done right in speaking against me behind my back. Mr. C——, Ann A——, and Thomas Bissicks, as the mouth of the rest, replied, they had said no more of me behind my back than they would say to my face; which was, that I did preach up man’s faithfulness, and not the faithfulness of God. In the evening was our love-feast in Bristol: In the conclusion of which, there being mention made that many of our brethren at Kingswood had formed themselves into a separate society I related to them at large the effects of the separations which had been made from time to time in London; and likewise the occasion of this, namely, Mr. C——’s preaching other doctrine than that they had before received. The natural consequence was, that when my brother and I preached the same which we had done from the beginning, many censured and spoke against us both; whence arose endless strife and confusion.

T—— B—— replied, why, we preached false doctrine; we preached that there is righteousness in man. I said, “So there is, after the righteousness of Christ is imputed to him through faith. But who told you that what we preached was false doctrine? Whom would you have believed this from, but Mr. C——?” Mr. C—— answered, “You do preach righteousness in man. I did say this: And I say it still. However, we are willing to join with you; but we will also meet apart from you: For we meet to confirm one another in those truths which you speak against.”

I replied, “You should have told me this before, and not have supplanted me in my own house, stealing the hearts of the people, and, by private accusations, separating very friends.” He said, “I have never privately accused you.” I said, “My brethren, judge;” and read as follows: — TO THE REV. MR. GEORGE WHITEFIELD.

“My Dear Brother, Jan. 17, 1741.

“THAT YOU might come quickly, I have written a second time. “I sit solitary, like Eli, waiting what will become of the ark. And while I wait, and fear the carrying of it away from among my people, my trouble increases daily. How glorious did the Gospel seem once to flourish in Kingswood! — I spake of the everlasting love of Christ with sweet power. But now brother Charles is suffered to open his mouth against this truth, while the frightened sheep gaze and fly, as if no shepherd was among them. It is just as though Satan was now making war with the saints in a more than common way. O pray for the distressed lambs yet left in this place, that they faint not! Surely they would, if preaching would do it: For they have nothing whereon to rest, (who now attend on the sermons,) but their own faithfulness.

“With Universal Redemption, brother Charles pleases the world: Brother John follows him in every thing. I believe no Atheist can more preach against Predestination than they: And all who believe Election are counted enemies to God, and called so.

“Fly, dear brother. I am as alone: I am in the midst of the plague. If God give thee leave, make haste.”

Mr. C—— stood up and said, “That letter is mine: I sent it to Mr. Whitefield; and I do not retract any thing in it, nor blame myself for sending it.”

Perceiving some of our brethren began to speak with warmth, I desired he would meet me at Kingswood on Saturday, where each of us could speak more freely, and that all things might sleep till then.

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The Bands meeting at Bristol, I read over the names of the United Society, being determined that no disorderly walker should remain therein. Accordingly, I took an account of every person,

1. To whom any reasonable objection was made.

2. Who was not known to and recommended by some, on whose veracity I could depend. To those who were sufficiently recommended, tickets were given on the following days. Most of the rest I had face to face with their accusers; and such as either appeared to be innocent, or confessed their faults and promised better behavior, were then received into the society. The others were put upon trial again, unless they voluntarily expelled themselves. About forty were by this means separated from us; I trust only for a season.

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I met the Kingswood Bands again, and heard all who desired it at large: After which, I read the following paper: — “By many witnesses it appears, that several members of the Band Society in Kingswood have made it their common practice to scoff at the preaching of Mr. John and Charles Wesley: That they have censured and spoken evil of them behind their backs, at the very time they professed love and esteem to their faces: That they have studiously endeavored to prejudice other members of that society against them; and, in order thereto, have belied and slandered them in divers instances.

“Therefore, not for their opinions, nor for any of them, (whether they be right or wrong,) but for the causes above mentioned, viz., for their scoffing at the word and Ministers of God, for their tale-bearing, backbiting, and evil-speaking, for their dissembling, lying, and slandering:

“I, John Wesley, by the consent and approbation of the Band Society in Kingswood, do declare the persons above mentioned to be no longer members thereof. Neither will they be so accounted, until they shall openly confess their fault, and thereby do what in them lies, to remove the scandal they have given.” At this they seemed a little shocked at first; but Mr. C——, T—— B—— , and A—— A——, soon recovered, and said, they had heard both my brother and me many times preach Popery. However, they would join with us if we would; but that they would not own they had done any thing amiss.

I desired them to consider of it yet again, and give us their answer the next evening.

The next evening, MARCH 1, they gave the same answer as before. However, I could not tell how to part; but exhorted them to wait yet a little longer, and wrestle with God, that they might know his will concerning them.

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Being still fearful of doing any thing rashly, or contrary to the great law of love, I consulted again with many of our brethren, concerning the farther steps I should take. In consequence of which, on Saturday, 7, all who could of the society being met together, I told them, open dealing was best; and I would therefore tell them plainly what I thought (setting all opinions aside) had been wrong in many of them, viz., “1. Their despising the Ministers of God, and slighting his ordinances;

2. Their not speaking or praying when met together, till they were sensibly moved thereto; and,

3. Their dividing themselves from their brethren, and forming a separate society.

“That we could not approve of delaying this matter, because the confusion that was already, increased daily.

“That, upon the whole, we believed the only way to put a stop to these growing evils was, for every one now to take his choice, and quit one society, or the other.”

T—— B—— replied, “It is our holding Election is the true cause of your separating from us.” I answered, “You know in your own conscience it is not. There are several Predestinarians in our societies both at London and Bristol; nor did I ever yet put any one out of either because he holden that opinion.”

He said, “Well, we will break up our society, on condition you will receive and employ Mr. C—— as you did before.”

I replied, “My brother has wronged me much. But he doth not say, ‘I repent.’”

Mr. C—— said, “Unless in not speaking in your defense, I do not know that I have wronged you at all.”

I rejoined, “It seems then nothing remains, but for each to choose which society he pleases.”

Then, after a short time spent in prayer, Mr. C—— went out, and about half of those who were present, with him.

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After preaching at Bristol, on the abuse and the right use of the Lord’s Supper, I earnestly besought them at Kingswood to beware of offending “in tongue,” either against justice, mercy, or truth. After sermon, the remains of our society met, and found we had great reason to bless God, for that, after fifty-two were withdrawn, we had still upwards of ninety left. O may these, at least, hold “the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace!”

I will shut up this melancholy subject with part of a letter wrote by my brother about this time: —

“If you think proper, you may show Brother C—— what follows.” — (N. B. I did not think it proper then.)

“My dearest brother John C, — in much love and tenderness I speak. You came to Kingswood upon my brother’s sending for you. You served under him in the Gospel as a son. I need not say how well he loved you. You used the authority he gave you, to overthrow his doctrine: You every where contradicted it; (whether true or false is not the question;) but you ought first to have fairly told him, ‘I preach contrary to you. Are you willing, notwithstanding, that I should continue in your house gainsaying you? If you are not, I have no place in these regions. You have a right to this open dealing. I now give you fair warning: Shall I stay here opposing you, or shall I depart?’

“My brother, have you dealt thus honestly and openly with him? No; but you have stolen away the people’s heart from him. And when some of them basely treated their best friend, God only excepted, how patiently did you take it! When did you ever vindicate us, as we have you? Why did you not plainly tell them, ‘You are eternally indebted to these men. Think not that I will stay among you, to head a party against my dearest friend — and brother, as he suffers me to call him, having humbled himself for my sake, and given me (no Bishop, Priest, or Deacon) the right hand of fellowship. If I hear that one word more is spoken against him, I will leave you that moment, and never see your face more.’

“This had been just and honest, and not more than we have deserved at your hands. I say we; for God is my witness, how condescendingly loving I have been toward you. Yet did you so forget yourself, as both openly and privately to contradict my doctrine; while, in the mean time, I was as a deaf man that heard not, neither answered a word, either in private or public.

“Ah, my brother! I am distressed for you. I would, — but you will not receive my saying. Therefore I can only commit you to Him who hath commanded us to forgive one another, even as God, for Christ’s sake, hath forgiven us.”

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I preached twice at Kingswood, and twice at Bristol, on those words of a troubled soul, “O that I had wings like a dove; for then would I flee away, and be at rest.”

One of the notes I received today was as follows: — “A person whom God has visited with a fever, and has wonderfully preserved seven days in a hay-mow, without any sustenance but now and then a little water out of a ditch, desires to return God thanks. The person is present, and ready to declare what God has done both for his body and soul. For the three first days of his illness, he felt nothing but the terrors of the Lord, greatly fearing lest he should drop into hell; till after long and earnest prayer, he felt himself given up to the will of God, and equally content to live or die. Then he fell unto a refreshing slumber, and awaked full of peace and the love of God.”

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From these words, “Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?” I preached a sermon (which I have not done before in Kingswood-school since it was built) directly on Predestination. On Wednesday (and so every Wednesday and Thursday) I saw the sick in Bristol: Many of whom I found were blessing God for his seasonable visitation. In the evening I put those of the women who were grown slack, into distinct Bands by themselves; and sharply reproved many for their unfaithfulness to the grace of God: Who bore witness to his word, by pouring upon us all the spirit of mourning and supplication.

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I visited many of the sick, and among the rest, J—— W—— who was in grievous pain both of body and mind. After a short time spent in prayer, we left her. But her pain was gone: Her soul being in full peace, and her body also so strengthened, that she immediately rose, and the next day went abroad.

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I explained, in the evening, the thirty-third chapter of Ezekiel: In applying which, I was suddenly seized with such a pain in my side, that I could not speak. I knew my remedy, and immediately kneeled down. In a moment the pain was gone: And the voice of the Lord cried aloud to the sinners, “Why will ye die, O house of Israel?”

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I visited the sick in Kingswood: One of whom surprised me much. Her husband died of the fever some days before. She was seized immediately after his death; then her eldest daughter; then another and another of her children, six of whom were now sick round about her, without either physic, money, food, or any visible means of procuring it. Who but a Christian can at such a time say from the heart, “Blessed be the name of the Lord?”

Finding all things now, both at Kingswood and Bristol, far more settled than I expected, I complied with my brother’s request, and setting out on Wednesday, 25, the next day came to London.

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Having heard much of Mr. Whitefield’s unkind behavior, since his return from Georgia, I went to him to hear him speak for himself, that I might know how to judge. I much approved of his plainness of speech. He told me, he and I preached two different gospels, and therefore he not only would not join with, or give me the right hand of fellowship, but was resolved publicly to preach against me and my brother, wheresoever he preached at all. Mr. Hall (who went with me) put him in mind of the promise he had made but a few days before, that, whatever his private opinion was, he would never publicly preach against us. He said, that promise was only an effect of human weakness, and he was now of another mind.

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I fixed an hour everyday for speaking with each of the Bands, that no disorderly walker might remain among them, nor any of a careless or contentious spirit. And the hours from ten to two, on everyday but Saturday, I set apart for speaking with any who should desire it.

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At his earnest and repeated request, I went to see one under sentence of death in the New Prison. But the keeper told me, Mr. Wilson (the Curate of the parish) had given charge I should not speak with him. I am clear from the blood of this man. Let Mr. Wilson answer for it to God.

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I believed both love and justice required that I should speak my sentiments freely to Mr. Wh——, concerning the letter he had published, said to be in answer to my Sermon on Free Grace. The sum of what I observed to him was this,

1. That it was quite imprudent to publish it at all, as being only the putting of weapons into their hands, who loved neither the one nor the other.

2. That if he was constrained to bear his testimony (as he termed it) against the error I was in, he might have done it by publishing a treatise on this head, without ever calling my name in question.

3. That what he had published was a mere burlesque upon an answer, leaving four of my eight arguments untouched, and handling the other four in so gentle a manner, as if he was afraid they would burn his fingers: However, that,

4. He had said enough of what was wholly foreign to the question, to make an open (and probably, irreparable) breach between him and me: Seeing “for a treacherous wound, and for the betraying of secrets, every friend will depart.”

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I had a long conversation with Peter Bohler. I marvel how I refrain from joining these men. I scarce ever see any of them but my heart burns within me. I long to be with them; and yet I am kept from them.

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I dined with one who had been a professed Atheist for upwards of twenty years. But coming some months since to make sport with the word of God, it cut him to the heart. And he could have no rest day nor night, till the God whom he had denied spoke peace to his soul. In the evening, having desired all the Bands to meet, I read over the names of the United Society; and marked those who were of a doubtful character, that full inquiry might be made concerning them. On Thursday, at the meeting of that society, I read over the names of these, and desired to speak with each of them the next day, as soon as they had opportunity. Many of them afterwards gave sufficient proof, that they were seeking Christ in sincerity. The rest I determined to keep on trial, till the doubts concerning them were removed.

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In the evening, at Short’s Gardens, I read over, in order to expound, the eighth chapter to the Romans. But thoughts and words crowded in so fast upon me, that I could get no farther than the first verse: Nor indeed, than that single clause, “Who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.”

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I was much concerned for one of our sisters, who, having been but a few times with the still brethren, was on a sudden so much wiser than her teachers, that I could neither understand her, nor she me. Nor could I help being a little surprised at the profound indifference she showed, who a few days before would have plucked out her eyes, had it been possible, and given them to me.

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I explained at Grayhound-Lane, the latter part of the fourth chapter to the Ephesians. I was so weak in body, that I could hardly stand; but my spirit was much strengthened.

I found myself growing sensibly weaker all Thursday; so that on Friday, 17, I could scarce get out of bed, and almost as soon as I was up, was constrained to lie down again. Never the less I made shift to drag myself on, in the evening, to Short’s Gardens. Having, not without difficulty, got up the stairs, I read those words, (though scarce intelligibly, for my voice too was almost gone,) “Whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate.” In a moment both my voice and strength returned: And from that time, for some weeks, I found such bodily strength, as I had never done before, since my landing in America.

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Being greatly concerned for those who were tossed about with divers winds of doctrine, many of whom were again entangled in sin, and carried away captive by Satan at his will; I besought God to show me where this would end, and opened my Bible on these words, “And there was nothing lacking to them, neither small nor great, neither sons nor daughters, neither spoil nor any thing that they had taken to them. David recovered all.”

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I wrote to my brother, then at Bristol, in the following words: —

“AS YET I dare in no wise join with the Moravians:

1. Because their general scheme is mystical, not scriptural; refined in every point above what is written; immeasurably beyond the plain Gospel.

2. Because there is darkness and closeness in all their behavior, and guile in almost all their words.

3. Because they not only do not practice, but utterly despise and decry, self-denial and the daily cross.

4. Because they conform to the world, in wearing gold and gay or costly apparel.

5. Because they are by no means zealous of good works, or at least only to their own people: For these reasons (chiefly) I will rather, God being my helper, stand quite alone than join with them: I mean till I have full assurance, that they are better acquainted with ‘the truth as it is in Jesus.’”

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I was with one who told me, she had been hitherto taught of man; but now she was taught of God only. She added, that God had told her not to partake of the Lord’s Supper any more; since she fed upon Christ continually. O who is secure from Satan transforming himself into an angel of light?

In the evening I went to a little love-feast which Peter Bohler made for those ten who joined together on this day three years, “to confess our faults one to another.” Seven of us were present; one being sick, and two unwilling to come. Surely the time will return, when there shall be again Union of mind, as in us all one soul!

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I had a conversation of several hours with P. Bohler and Mr. Spangenberg. Our subject was, a new creature; Mr. Spangenberg’s account of which was this: —

“The moment we are justified, a new creature is put into us. This is otherwise termed, the new man.

“But notwithstanding, the old creature or the old man remains in us till the day of our death.

“And in this old man there remains an old heart, corrupt and abominable. For inward corruption remains in the soul as long as the soul remains in the body.

“But the heart which is in the new man is clean. And the new man is stronger than the old; so that though corruption continually strives, yet while we look to Christ it cannot prevail.” I asked him, “Is there still an old man in you?” He said, “Yes; and will be as long as I live.” I said, “Is there then corruption in your heart?” He replied, “In the heart of my old man there is: But not in the heart of my new man.” I asked, “Does the experience of your brethren agree with yours?” He answered, “I know what I have now spoken is the experience of all the brethren and sisters throughout our Church.” A few of our brethren and sisters sitting by, then spoke what they experienced. He told them, (with great emotion, his hand trembling much,) “You all deceive your own souls. There is no higher state than that I have described. You are in a very dangerous error. You know not your own hearts. You fancy your corruptions are taken away, whereas they are only covered. Inward corruption never can be taken away, till our bodies are in the dust.’

Was there inward corruption in our Lord? Or, cannot the servant be as his Master?

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I gave the scriptural account of one who is “in Christ a new creature,” from whom “old things are passed away,” and in whom “all things are become new.” In the afternoon I explained at Mary-le-bone-Fields, to a vast multitude of people, “He hath showed thee, O man, what is good. And what doth the Lord require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? “The devil’s children fought valiantly for their master, that his kingdom should not be destroyed. And many stones fell on my right hand and on my left. But when I began to examine them closely, what reward they were to have for their labor, they vanished away like smoke.

Wed. 6, was a day on which we agreed to meet for prayer and humbling our souls before God, if haply he might show us his will concerning our re-union with our brethren of Fetter-Lane. And to this intent all the men and women Bands met at one in the afternoon. Nor did our Lord cast out our prayer, or leave himself without witness among us. But it was clear to all, even those who were before the most eagerly desirous of it, that the time was not come.

1. Because they had not given up their most essentially erroneous doctrines; and,

2. Because many of us had found so much guile in their words, that we could scarce tell what they really holden, and what not.

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Reminded the United Society, that many of our brethren and sisters had not needful food; many were destitute of convenient clothing; many were out of business, and that without their own fault; and many sick and ready to perish: That I had done what in me lay to feed the hungry, to clothe the naked, to employ the poor, and to visit the sick; but was not, alone, sufficient for these things; and therefore desired all whose hearts were as my heart,

1. To bring what clothes each could spare, to be distributed among those that wanted most.

2. To give weekly a penny, or what they could afford, for the relief of the poor and sick.

My design, I told them, is to employ, for the present, all the women who are out of business, and desire it, in knitting.

To these we will first give the common price for what work they do; and then add, according as they need.

Twelve persons are appointed to inspect these, and to visit and provide things needful for the sick.

Each of these is to visit all the sick within their district, every other day: And to meet on Tuesday evening, to give an account of what they have done, and consult what can be done farther.

This week the Lord of the harvest began to put in his sickle among us. On Tuesday our brother Price, our sister Bowes on Wednesday, today our sister Hawthorn, died. They all went in full and certain hope, to Him whom their soul loved.

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I found myself much out of order. However, I made shift to preach in the evening: But on Saturday my bodily strength quite failed, so that for several hours I could scarce lift up my head. Sunday, 10. I was obliged to lie down most part of the day, being easy only in that posture. Yet in the evening my weakness was suspended, while I was calling sinners to repentance. But at our love-feast which followed, beside the pain in my back and head, and the fever which still continued upon me, just as I began to pray, I was seized with such a cough, that I could hardly speak. At the same time came strongly into my mind, “These signs shall follow them that believe.” I called on Jesus aloud, to “increase my faith;” and to “confirm the word of his grace.” While I was speaking, my pain vanished away; the fever left me; my bodily strength returned; and for many weeks I felt neither weakness nor pain. “Unto thee, O Lord, do I give thanks.”

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Hearing that one was in a high fever, of whom I had for some time stood in doubt, I went to her, and asked how she did. She replied, “I am very ill, — but I am very well. O I am happy, happy, happy! for my spirit continually rejoices in God my Savior. All the angels in heaven rejoice in my Savior. And I rejoice with them, for I am united to Jesus.” She added, “How the angels rejoice over an heir of salvation! How they now rejoice over me! And I am partaker of their joy. O my Savior, how happy am I in thee! “

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I called again. She was saying as I came in, “My Beloved is mine; and He hath cleansed me from all sin. O how far is the heaven above the earth! So far hath He set my sins from me. O how did He rejoice, when ‘He was heard in that He feared!’ He was heard, and He gained a possibility of salvation for me and all mankind. It is finished: His grace is free for all: I am a witness: I was the chief of sinners, a backsliding sinner, a sinner against light and love: But I am washed: I am cleansed.” I asked, “Do you expect to die now?” She said, “It is not shown me that I shall. But life or death is all one to me. I shall not change my company. Yet I shall more abundantly rejoice when we stand before the Lord; you and I, and all the other children which He hath given you.” In the evening I called upon her again, and found her weaker, and her speech much altered. I asked her, “Do you now believe? Do not you find your soul in temptation?” She answered, smiling and looking up, “There is the Lamb: And where he is, what is temptation? I have no darkness, no cloud. The enemy may come; but he hath no part in me.” I said, “But does not your sickness hinder you?” She replied, “Nothing hinders me. It is the Spirit of my Father that worketh in me: And nothing hinders that Spirit. My body indeed in weak and in pain: But my soul is all joy and praise.”

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I mentioned this to Peter Bohler. But he told me, “There is no such state on earth. Sin will and must always remain in the soul. The old man will remain till death. The old nature is like an old tooth: You may break off one bit, and another, and another; but you can never get it all away: The stump of it will stay as long as you live; and sometimes will ache too.”

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At the pressing instance of my brother, I left London, and the next evening met him at Bristol. I was a little surprised when I came into the room, just after he had ended his sermon. Some wept aloud; some clapped their hands; some shouted; and the rest sang praise; with whom (having soon recovered themselves) the whole congregation joined. So I trust, if ever God were pleased that we should suffer for the truth’s sake, all other sounds would soon be swallowed up in the voice of praise and thanksgiving.

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I spent most of the morning in speaking with the new members of the society. In the afternoon I saw the sick; but not one in fear, neither repining against God.

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In the evening I published the great decree of God, eternal, unchangeable, (so miserably misunderstood and misrepresented by vain men that would be wise,) “He that believeth shall be saved; he that believeth not shall be damned.”

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At a meeting of the Stewards of the society, (who receive and expend what is contributed weekly,) it was found needful to retrench the expenses; the contributions not answering thereto. And it was accordingly agreed to discharge two of the Schoolmasters at Bristol; the present fund being barely sufficient to keep two Masters and a Mistress here, and one Master and a Mistress at Kingswood.

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Having settled all the business on which I came, I set out early, and on Tuesday called at Windsor. I found here also a few, who have peace with God, and are full of love both to Him and to one another. In the evening I preached at the Foundery, on, “Stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord.”

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I spent an hour with poor Mr. M——e. His usual frown was vanished away. His look was clear, open, and composed. He listened to the word of reconciliation with all possible marks of deep attention, though he was too weak to speak. Before I went, we commended him to the grace of God, in confidence that our prayer was heard: To whom, at two in the morning, he resigned his spirit, without any sigh or groan.

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I spoke plainly to Mr. Piers, who told me he had been much shaken by the still brethren. But the snare is broken: I left him rejoicing in hope, and praising God for the consolation.

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I exhorted a crowded congregation, not to “receive the grace of God in vain.” The same exhortation I enforced on the society: (About nine hundred persons:) And by their fruits it doth appear that they begin to love one another, “not in word” only, “but in deed and in truth.”

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Hearing that a deaf and dumb man near Marienborne, had procured a remarkable letter to be wrote into England, I asked James Hutton, if he knew of that letter; and what the purport of it was. He answered, Yes; he had read the letter; but had quite forgot what it was about. I then asked Mr. V——, who replied, The letter was short, but he did not remember the purport of it.

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I preached in Charles’-Square, on, “The hour is coming, and now is, when the dead shall hear the voice of the Son of God; and they that hear shall live.” A violent storm began about the middle of the sermon: But these things move not those who seek the Lord. So much the more was his power present to heal; in so much that many of our hearts danced for joy, praising “the glorious God that maketh the thunder.”

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I set out from Enfield-Chace for Leicestershire. In the evening we came to Northampton: And the next afternoon to Mr. Ellis’s at Markfield, five or six miles beyond Leicester. For these two days, I had made an experiment which I had been so often and earnestly pressed to do: — Speaking to none concerning the things of God, unless my heart was free to it. And what was the event? Why,

1. That I spoke to none at all for fourscore miles together: No, not even to him that traveled with me in the chaise, unless a few words at first setting out.

2. That I had no cross either to bear or to take up, and commonly in an hour or two fell fast asleep.

3. That I had much respect shown me wherever I came; every one behaving to me, as to a civil, good-natured gentleman. O how pleasing is all this to flesh and blood! Need ye “compass sea and land,” to make “proselytes” to this?

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I preached in the morning, on the inward kingdom of God. And many, I trust found they were Heathens in heart, and Christians in name only.

In the afternoon we came to J—— C——n’s, about ten miles beyond Markfield; a plain, open-hearted man, desirous to know and do the will of God. I was a little surprised at what he said: “A few months since there was a great awakening all round us: But since Mr. S—— came, three parts in four are fallen as fast asleep as ever.” I spoke to him of drawing people from the Church, and advising them to leave off prayer. He said, there was no Church of England left; and that there was no scripture for family prayer, nor for praying in private at any other particular times; which a believer need not do. I asked, what our Savior then meant by saying, “Enter into thy closet and pray.” He said, “O! that means, Enter into the closet of your heart.”

Between five and six we came to Ogbrook, where Mr. S——n then was. I asked Mr. Greaves, what doctrine he taught here. He said, “The sum of all is this: ‘If you will believe, be still. Do not pretend to do good; (which you cannot do till you believe;) and leave off what you call the means of grace; such as prayer, and running to church and sacrament.’” About eight, Mr. Greaves offering me the use of his church, I explained the true Gospel stillness; and in the morning, Thursday, 11, to a large congregation, “By grace are ye saved through faith.”

In the afternoon we went on to Nottingham, where Mr. Howe received us gladly. At eight the society met as usual. I could not but observe,

1. That the room was not half full, which used, till very lately, to be crowded within and without.

2. That not one person who came in used any prayer at all; but every one immediately sat down, and began either talking to his neighbor, or looking about to see who was there.

3. That when I began to pray, there appeared a general surprise, none once offering to kneel down, and those who stood, choosing the most easy, indolent posture which they conveniently could. I afterward looked for one of our Hymn-books upon the desk; (which I knew Mr. Howe had brought from London;) but both that and the Bible were vanished away; and in the room lay the Moravian hymns and the Count’s sermons.

I expounded, (but with a heavy heart,) “Believe in the Lord Jesus, and thou shalt be saved;” and the next morning described (if haply some of the secure ones might awake from the sleep of death) the fruits of true faith, “righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost.” In the evening we came to Markfield again, where the church was quite full, while I explained, “All we like sheep have gone astray;... and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.”

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In the morning I preached on those words, “To him that worketh not, but believeth on him that justifieth the ungodly, his faith is counted to him for righteousness.” We then set out for Melbourn, where, finding the house too small to contain those who were come together, I stood under a large tree, and declared Him whom “God hath exalted to be a Prince and a Savior, to give repentance unto Israel, and remission of sins.” Thence I went to Hemmington, where also, the house not being large enough to contain the people, they stood about the door and at both the windows, while I showed “what” we “must do to be saved.” One of our company seemed a little offended when I had done, at “a vile fellow, notorious all over the country for cursing, swearing, and drunkenness; though he was now gray headed, being near four-score years of age.” He came to me, and catching me hold by the hands, said, “Whether thou art a good or a bad man, I know not; but I know the words thou speakest are good. I never heard the like in all my life. O that God would set them home upon my poor soul!” He then burst into tears, so that he could speak no more.

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I rode to Nottingham again, and at eight preached at the market-place, to an immense multitude of people, on, “The dead shall hear the voice of the Son of God; and they that hear shall live.” I saw only one or two who behaved lightly, whom I immediately spoke to; and they stood reproved. Yet, soon after, a man behind me began aloud to contradict and blaspheme; but upon my turning to him, he stepped behind a pillar, and in a few minutes disappeared.

In the afternoon we returned to Markfield. The church was so excessive hot, (being crowded in every corner,) that I could not, without difficulty, read the Evening Service. Being afterwards informed that abundance of people were still without, who could not possibly get into the church, I went out to them, and explained that great promise of our Lord, “I will heal their backsliding: I will love them freely.” In the evening I expounded in the church, on her who “loved much, because she had much forgiven.”

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I set out for London, and read over in the way, that celebrated book, Martin Luther’s “Comment on the Epistle to the Galatians.” I was utterly ashamed. How have I esteemed this book, only because I heard it so commended by others; or, at best, because I had read some excellent sentences occasionally quoted from it! But what shall I say, now I judge for myself? Now I see with my own eyes? Why, not only that the author makes nothing out, clears up not one considerable difficulty; that he is quite shallow in his remarks on many passages, and muddy and confused almost on all; but that he is deeply tinctured with Mysticism throughout, and hence often dangerously wrong. To instance only in one or two points: — How does he (almost in the words of Tauler) decry reason, right or wrong, as an irreconcilable enemy to the Gospel of Christ! Whereas, what is reason (the faculty so called) but the power of apprehending, judging, and discoursing? Which power is no more to be condemned in the gross, than seeing, hearing, or feeling. Again, how blasphemously does he speak of good works and of the Law of God; constantly coupling the Law with sin, death, hell, or the devil; and teaching, that Christ delivers us from them all alike. Whereas, it can no more be proved by Scripture that Christ delivers us from the Law of God, than that he delivers us from holiness or from heaven. Here (I apprehend) is the real spring of the grand error of the Moravians. They follow Luther, for better for worse. Hence their “No works; no Law; no commandments.” But who art thou that “speakest evil of the Law, and judgest the Law?”

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In the evening I came to London, and preached on those words, (Galatians 6:15,) “In Christ Jesus neither circumcision availeth any thing, nor uncircumcision, but a new creature.” After reading Luther’s miserable comment upon the text, I thought it my bounden duty openly to warn the congregation against that dangerous treatise; and to retract whatever recommendation I might ignorantly have given of it.

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I set out, and rode slowly toward Oxford; but before I came to Wycombe my horse tired. There I hired another, which tired also before I carne to Tetsworth. I hired a third here, and reached Oxford in the evening.

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I inquired concerning the exercises previous to the degree of Bachelor in Divinity, and advised with Mr. Gambold concerning the subject of my sermon before the University; but he seemed to think it of no moment: “For;” said he, “all here are so prejudiced, that they will mind nothing you say.” I know not that. However, I am to deliver my own soul, whether they will hear, or whether they will forbear.

I found a great change among the poor people here. Out of twenty-five or thirty weekly communicants, only two were left. Not one continued to attend the daily Prayers of the Church. And those few that were once united together, were now torn asunder, and scattered abroad.

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The words on which my book opened at the society, in the evening, were these: — “Ye are gone away from mine ordinances, and have not kept them. Return unto me, and I will return unto you, saith the Lord of hosts. Your words have been stout against me, saith the Lord. But ye say, What have we spoken so much against thee? Ye have said, It is vain to serve God: And what profit is it that we have kept his ordinance?” (Malachi 3:7,13,14.)

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I read over, and partly transcribed, Bishop Bull’s Harmonia Apostoltca. The position with which he sets out is this: “That all good works, and not faith alone, are the necessarily previous condition of justification,” or the forgiveness of our sins. But in the middle of the treatise he asserts, “That faith alone is the condition of justification:” “For faith,” says he, “referred to justification, means all inward and outward good works.” In the latter end, he affirms, “that there are two justifications; and that only inward good works necessarily precede the former, but both inward and outward, the latter.”

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I rode to London, and enforced, in the evening, that solemn declaration of the great Apostle, “Do we then make void the Law through faith God forbid. Yea, we establish the Law.”

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I showed in the morning at large, “Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty;” liberty from sin; liberty to be, to do, and to suffer, according to the written word. At five I preached at Charles’-Square, to the largest congregation that, I believe, was ever seen there, on, “Almost thou persuadest me to be a Christian.” As soon as I had done, I quite lost my voice. But it was immediately restored, when I came to our little flock, with the blessing of the Gospel of peace; and I spent an hour and half in exhortation and prayer, without any hoarseness, faintness, or weariness.

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I preached in the morning, on, “Ye are saved through faith.” In the afternoon I expounded, at Windsor, the story of the Pharisee and Publican. I spent the evening at Wycombe, and the next morning, Tuesday, 30, returned to Oxford.

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I met Mr. Gambold again; who honestly told me, he was ashamed of my company; and therefore must be excused from going to the society with me. This is plain dealing at least!

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I had much talk with Mr. V——, who allowed,

1. That there are many (not one only) commands of God, both to believers and unbelievers; and,

2. That the Lord’s Supper, the Scripture, and both public and private prayer, are God’s ordinary means of conveying grace to man. But what will this private confession avail, so long as the quite contrary is still declared in those “Sixteen Discourses,” published to all the world, and never yet either corrected or retracted?

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Looking for a book in our College Library, I took down, by mistake, the Works of Episcopius; which opening on an account of the Synod of Dort, I believed it might be useful to read it through. But what a scene is here disclosed! I wonder not at the heavy curse of God, which so soon after fell on our Church and nation. What a pity it is, that the holy Synod Of Trent, and that of Dort, did not sit at the same time; nearly allied as they were, not only as to the purity of doctrine which each of them established, but also as to the spirit wherewith they acted; if the latter did not exceed!

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Being in the Bodleian Library, I light on Mr. Calvin’s account of the case of Michael Servetus; several of whose letters he occasionally inserts; wherein Servetus often declares in terms, “I believe the Father is God, the Son is God, and the Holy Ghost is God.” Mr. Calvin, however, paints him such a monster as never was, — an Arian, a blasphemer, and what not: Besides strewing over him his flowers of “dog, devil, swine,” and so on; which are the usual appellations he gives to his opponents. But still he utterly denies his being the cause of Servetus’s death. “No,” says he, “I only advised our Magistrates, as having a right to restrain heretics by the sword, to seize upon and try that arch-heretic. But after he was condemned, I said not one word about his execution!”

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I rode to London, and preached at Short’s-Gardens, on, “the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth.” Sunday, 12. While I was showing, at Charles’-Square, what it is “to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with our God,” a great shout began. Many of the rabble had brought an ox, which they were vehemently laboring to drive in among the people. But their labor was in vain; for in spite of them all, he ran round and round, one way and the other, and at length broke through the midst of them clear away, leaving us calmly rejoicing and praising God.

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I returned to Oxford, and on Wednesday rode to Bristol. My brother, I found, was already gone to Wales; so that I came just in season; and that, indeed, on another account also; for a spirit of enthusiasm was breaking in upon many, who charged their own imaginations on the will of God, and that not written, but impressed on their hearts. If these impressions be received as the rule of action, instead of the written word, I know nothing so wicked or absurd but we may fall into, and that without remedy.

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The school at Kingswood was thoroughly filled between eight and nine in the evening. I showed them, from the example of the Corinthians, what need we have to bear one with another, seeing we are not to expect many fathers in Christ, no, nor young men among us, as yet. We then poured out our souls in prayer and praise, and our Lord did not hide his face from us.

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After preaching twice at Bristol, and twice at Kingswood, I earnestly exhorted the society to continue in the faith, “enduring hardship, as good soldiers of Jesus Christ.” On Monday (my brother being now returned from Wales) I rode back to Oxford.

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At the repeated instance of some that were there, I went over to Abingdon. I preached on, “What must I do to be saved?” Both the yard and house were full. But so stupid, senseless a people, both in a spiritual and natural sense, I scarce ever saw before. Yet God is able, of “these stones, to raise up children to Abraham.”

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Several of our friends from London, and some from Kingswood and Bristol, came to Oxford. Alas! how long shall they “come from the east, and from the west, and sit down in the kingdom of God,” while the children of the kingdom will not come in, but remain in utter darkness!

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It being my turn, (which comes about once in three years,) I preached at St. Mary’s, before the University. The harvest truly is plenteous. So numerous a congregation (from whatever motives they came) I have seldom seen at Oxford. My text was the confession of poor Agrippa, “Almost thou persuadest me to be a Christian.” I have “cast my bread upon the waters.” Let me “find it again after many days!” In the afternoon I set out, (having no time to spare,) and on Sunday, 26, preached at the Foundery, on the “liberty” we have “to enter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus.”

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Finding notice had been given, that I would preach in the evening at Hackney, I went thither, and openly declared those glad tidings, “By grace are ye saved through faith.” Many, we heard, had threatened terrible things; but no man opened his mouth. Perceive ye not yet, that “greater is He that is in us, than he that in the world?”

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I visited one that was going heavily and in fear “through the valley of the shadow of death.” But God heard the prayer, and soon lifted up the light of his countenance upon her: So that she immediately broke out into thanksgiving, and the next day quietly fell asleep.

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Hearing that one of our sisters (Jane Muncy) was ill, I went to see her. She was one of the first women Bands at Fetter-Lane; and, when the controversy concerning the means of grace began, stood in the gap, and contended earnestly for the ordinances once delivered to the saints. When, soon after, it was ordered, that the unmarried men and women should have no conversation with each other, she again withstood to the face those who were “teaching for doctrines the commandments of men.” Nor could all the sophistry of those who are, without controversy, of all men living the wisest in their generation, induce her either to deny the faith she had received, or to use less plainness of speech, or to be less zealous in recommending and careful in practicing good works. In so much that many times, when she had been employed in the labor of love, till eight or nine in the evening, she then sat down and wrought with her hands till twelve or one in the morning; not that she wanted any thing herself, but that she might have to give to others for necessary uses.

From the time that she was made Leader of one or two Bands, she was more eminently a pattern to the flock: In self-denial of every kind, in openness of behavior, in simplicity and godly sincerity, in steadfast faith, in constant attendance on all the public and all the private ordinances of God. And as she had labored more than they all, so God now called her forth to suffer. She was seized at first with a violent fever, in the beginning of which they removed her to another house. Here she had work to do which she knew not of. The master of the house was one who “cared for none of these things.” But he observed her, and was convinced. So that he then began to understand and lay to heart the things that bring a man peace at the last.

In a few days the fever abated, or settled, as it seemed, into an inward imposthume; so that she could not breathe without violent pain, which increased day and night. When I came in, she stretched out her hand and said, “Art thou come, thou blessed of the Lord? Praised be the name of my Lord for this.” I asked, “Do you faint, now you are chastened of him?” She said, “O no, no, no; I faint not; I murmur not; I rejoice evermore.” I said, “But can you in every thing give thanks?” She replied, “Yes; I do, I do.” I said, “God will make all your bed in your sickness.” She cried out, “He does, he does; I have nothing to desire; he is ever with me, and I have nothing to do but to praise him.”

In the same state of mind, though weaker and weaker in body, she continued till Tuesday following; when several of those who had been in her Band being present, she fixed her eyes upon them, and fell into a kind of agonizing prayer, that God would keep them from the evil one. But in the afternoon, when I came, she was quite calm again, and all her words were prayer and praise. The same spirit she breathed when Mr. Maxfield called the next day; and soon after he went, she slept in peace. — “A mother in Israel” hast thou been, and thy works shall praise thee in the gates!”

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I had a long conversation with Mr. Ingham. We both agreed,

1. That none shall finally be saved, who have not, as they had opportunity, done all good works; and,

2. That if a justified person does not do good, as he has opportunity, he will lose the grace he has received; and if he “repent” not, “and do the former works,” will perish eternally. But with regard to the unjustified, (if I understand him,) we wholly disagreed. He believed it is not the will of God, that they should wait for faith in doing good. I believe, this is the will of God; and that they will never find him, unless they seek him in this way.

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I went, after having been long importuned by Dr. Deleznot, to the chapel in Great Hermitage-Street, Wapping. Mr. Meriton (a Clergyman from the Isle of Man) read prayers. I then preached on these words in the former Lesson, “Seest thou how Ahab humbleth himself? Because he hath humbled himself, I will not bring this evil in his days:” And took occasion thence to exhort all unbelievers, to use the grace God had already given them; and in keeping his Law, according to the power they now had, to wait for the faith of the Gospel.

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The body of our sister Muncy being brought to Short’s-Gardens, I preached on those words, “Write, Blessed are the dead which die in the Lord from henceforth: Yea, saith the Spirit, that they may rest from their labors; and their works do follow them.” From thence we went with it to the grave, in St. Giles’s church-yard, where I performed the last office in the presence of such an innumerable multitude of people as I never saw gathered together before. O what a sight it will be when God saith to the grave, “Give back;” and all the dead, small and great, shall stand before him!

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I visited one whom God is purifying in the fire, in answer to the prayers of his wife, whom he was just going to beat, (which he frequently did,) when God smote him in a moment, so that his hand dropped, and he fell down upon the ground, having no more strength than a new-born child. He has been confined to his bed ever since; but rejoices in hope of the glory of God.

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Calling on a person near Grosvenor-Square, I found there was but too much reason here for crying out of the increase of Popery; many converts to it being continually made, by the gentleman who preaches in Swallow Street, three days in every week. Now, why do not the champions who are continually crying out, “Popery, Popery,” in Moorfields, come hither, that they may not always be fighting “as one that beateth the air?” Plainly, because they have no mind to fight at all; but to show their valor without an opponent. And they well know, they may defy Popery at the Foundery, without any danger of contradiction.

WES_WW01.PDF, p. 347

The scripture which came in turn to be expounded, was the ninth chapter to the Romans. I was then constrained to speak an hour longer than usual; and am persuaded most, if not all who were present, saw that this chapter has no more to do with personal, irrespective predestination, than the ninth of Genesis.

WES_WW01.PDF, p. 348

A Clergyman having sent me word, that if I would preach in the evening on the text he named, he would come to hear me, I preached on that text, Matthew 7:15. And strongly enforced the caution of our Lord, to “beware of false Prophets;” that is, all Preachers who do not speak as the Oracles of God.

WES_WW01.PDF, p. 348

I explained, at Chelsea, the nature and necessity of the new birth. One (who, I afterwards heard, was a Dissenting Teacher) asked me when I had done, “Quid est tibi nomen?” And on my not answering, turned in triumph to his companions, and said, “Ay, I told you he did not understand Latin!”

WES_WW01.PDF, p. 348

I was informed of a remarkable conversation, at which one of our sisters was present a day or two before; wherein a gentleman was assuring his friends, that he himself was in Charles-Square, when a person told Mr. Wesley to his face, that he, Mr. Wesley, had paid twenty pounds already, on being convicted for selling Geneva; and that he now kept two Popish Priests in his house. This gave occasion to another to mention what he had himself heard, at an eminent Dissenting Teacher’s, viz., that it was beyond dispute, Mr. Wesley had large remittances from Spain, in order to make a party among the poor; and that as soon as the Spaniards landed, he was to join them with twenty thousand men.

WES_WW01.PDF, p. 348

Editorial note: The supplied edition prints the heading “Sun. 31. —”. The independent 1872 Jackson edition, volume 1, reads “Mon. 31” (PDF page 350). The indexed weekday is Monday, following that printed heading. The supplied heading and journal prose are retained. John Wesley, Works, Jackson edition (1872), volume 1, PDF page 350.

I began my course of preaching on the Common Prayer.

WES_WW01.PDF, p. 348

I read over Mr. Whitefield’s account of God’s dealings with his soul. Great part of this I know to be true. O “let not mercy and truth forsake thee! Bind them about thy neck! Write them upon the table of thy heart!”

WES_WW01.PDF, p. 348

James Hutton having sent me word, that Count Zinzendorf would meet me at three in the afternoon, I went at that time to Gray’s-Inn Walks. The most material part of our conversation (which I dare not conceal) was as follows: — To spare the dead I do not translate: — Z. Cur Religionem tuam mutasti?

W. Nescio me Religionem meam mutasse. Cur id sentis? Quis hoc tibi retulit?

Z. Plane tu. Id ex epistola tua ad nos video. Ibi, Religione, quam apud nos professus es, relicta, novam profiteris.

W. Qui sic? Non intelligo.

Z. Imo, istic dicis, “Vere Christianos non esse miseros peccatores.” Falsissimum. Optimi hominum ad mortem usque miserabilissimi sunt peccatores. Siqui aliud dicunt, vel penitus impostores sunt, vel diabolice seducti. Nostros fratres meliora docentes impugnasti. Et pacem volentibus, eam denegasti.

W. Nondum intelligo quid velis.

Z. Ego, cum ex Georgia ad me scripsisti, te dilexi plurimum. Tum corde simplicem te agnovi. Iterum scripsisti. Agnovi corde simplicem, sed turbatis ideis. Ad nos venisti. Idea tuaetum magis turbatoe erant et confusae. In Angliam redisti. Aliquandiu post, audivi fratres nostros tecum pugnare. Spangenbergium misi ad pacem inter vos

conciliandam. Scripsit mihi, “Fratres tibi injuriam intulisse.” Rescripsi, ne pergerent, sed et veniam a te peterent. Spangenberg scripsit iterum, “Eos petiisse; sed te gloriari de iis, pacetm nolle.” Jam adveniens, idem audio.

W. Res in eo cardine minime vertitur. Fratres tui (verum hoc) me male tractarunt. Postea veniam petierunt. Respondi, “Id supervacaneum; me nunquam iis succensuisse: Sed vereri,

1. Ne falsa docerent.

2. Ne prave viverent.”

Ista unica, est, et fuit, inter nos quaestio.

Z. Apertius loquaris,

W. Veritus sum, ne falsa docerent,

1. De fine fidei nostrae (in hac vita) scil. Christiana perfectione.

2. De mediis gratice, sic ab Ecclesia nostrd dictis.

Z. Nullam inhoerentem perfectionem in hac vita agnosco. Est hic error errorum. Eum per totum orbem igne et gladio persequor, conculco, ad internecionem do. Christus est sola Perfectio nostra. Qui perfectionem inhoerentem sequitur, Christum denegat.

W. Ego vero credo, Spiritum Christi operari perfectionem in vere Christianis.

Z. Nullimode. Omnis nostra perfectio est in Christo. Omnis Christiana perfectio est, fides in sanyuine Christi. Est tota Christiana perfectio, imputata, non inhaerens. Perfecti sumus in Christo, in nobismet nunquam perfecti.

W. Pugnamus, opinor, de verbis. Nonne omnis vere credens sanctus est?

Z. Maxime. Sed sanctus in Christo, non in se.

W. Sed, nonne sancte vivit?

Z. Imo, sancte in omnibus uivit.

W. Nonne et cor sanctum habet?

Z. Certissime.

W. Nonne, ex consequenti, sanctus est in se?

Z. Non, non. In Cristo tantum. Non sanctus in se. Nullam omnino habet sanctitatem in se.

W. Nonne habet in corde suo amorem Dei et proximi, quin et totam imaginem Dei?

Z. Habet. Sed haec sunt sanctitas legalis, non Evangelica. Sanctitas Evangelica est fides.

W. Omnino lis est de verbis. Concedis, credentis cor totum esse sanctum et vitam totam: Eum amare Deum toto corde, eique servire totis viribus. Nihil ultra peto. Nil aliud volo per Perfectio vel Sanctitas Christiana.

Z. Sed haec non est sanctitas ejus. Non magis sanctus est, si magis amat, neque minus sanctus, siminus amat.

W. Quid? Nonne credens, dum crescit in amore, crescit pariter in sanctitate?

Z. Nequaquam. Eo momento quo justificatur, sanctifcatur penitus. Exin, neque magis sanctus est, neque minus sanctus, ad mortem usque. W. Nonne igitur Pater in Christo sanctior est Infante recens nato! Z. Non. Sanctificatio totalis ac Justificatio in eodem sunt instanti; et neutra recipit magis aut minus.

W. Nonne vero credens crescit indies amore Dei? Num perfectus est amore simulac justificatur?

Z. Est. Non unquam ereseit in amore. Dei. Totaliter amat eo momento, sicut totaliter sanetificatur.

W. Quid itaque vult Apostolus Paulus, per, “Renovamur de die in diem?”

Z. Dicam. Plumbum sw in aurum mutetur, est aurum primo die, et secundo, et tertio. Et sic renovatur de die in diem. Sed nunquam est mayis aurum, quam primo die.

W. Potavi, crescendum esse in gratia!

Z. Certe. Sed non in sanctitate. Simulac justificatur quis, Pater, Fililus et Spiritus Sanctus habitant in ipsius corde. Et cor ejus eo momento oeque purum est ac unquam erit. Infans in Christo tam purus corde est quam Pater in Christo. Nulla est discrepantia.

W. Nonne justiJicati erant Apostoli ante Christi mortem? Z. Erant.

W. Nonne vero sanctiores erant post diem Penteeostes, quam ante Christi mortem?

Z. Neutiquam.

W. Nonne eo die impleti sunt Spiritu Sancto?

Z. Erant. Sed istud donum Spiritus, sanctitatem ipsorum non respexit. Fuit donum miraculorum tantum.

W. Fortasse te non capio. Nonne nos ipsos abnegantes, magis magisque mundo morimur, ac Deo vivimus?

Z. Abnegationem omnem respuimus, conculcamus. Facimus credentes omne quod volumus et nihil ultra. Mortificationem omnem ridemus. Nulla purificatio praecedit perfectum amorem.

W. Quce dixisti, Deo adjuvante, perpendam.¹

The LETTER referred to by the Count was written August 8, preceding. It was as follows, excepting two or three paragraphs, which I have omitted as less material: —

JOHN WESLEY, A PRESBYTER OF THE CHURCH OF GOD IN

ENGLAND, TO THE CHURCH OF GOD AT HERNHUTH IN

UPPER LUSATIA.

1. IT may seem strange, that such an one as I am should take upon me to write to you. You I believe to be dear children of God, through faith which is in Jesus. Me you believe (as some of you have declared) to be “a child of the devil, a servant of corruption.” Yet whatsoever I am, or what so ever you are, I beseech you to weigh the following words; if haply God, who “sendeth by whom he will send,” may give you light thereby; although “the mist of darkness” (as one of you affirms) should be reserved for me for ever.

2. My design is, freely and plainly to speak whatsoever I have seen or heard among you, in any part of your Church, which seems not agreeable to the Gospel of Christ. And my hope is, that the God whom you serve, will give you thoroughly to weigh what is spoken; and if in any thing “ye have been otherwise minded” than the truth is, “will reveal even this unto you.”

3. And First, With regard to Christian salvation, even the present salvation which is through faith, I have heard some of you affirm,

(1.) That it does not imply the proper taking away our sins, the cleansing our souls from all sin, but only the tearing the system of sin in pieces.

(2.) That it does not imply liberty from sinful thoughts.

4. I have heard some of you affirm, on the other hand,

(1.) That it does imply liberty from the commandments of God, so that one who is saved through faith, is not obliged or bound to obey them, does not do any thing as a commandment, or as a duty. To support which they have affirmed, that there is² no command in the New Testament but to believe; that there is no duty required therein, but that of believing; and that to a believer there is no commandment at all.

(2.) That it does imply liberty to conform to the world,³ by talking on useless, if not trifling subjects; by joining in worldly diversions in order to do good; by putting on of gold and costly apparel,⁴ or by continuing in those professions, the gain of which depends on ministering hereto.

(3.) That it does imply liberty to avoid persecution, by⁵ not reproving even those who sin in your sight; by not letting your light shine before those men who love darkness rather than light; by not using plainness of speech, and a frank, open carriage to all men. Nay, by a close, dark, reserved conversation and behavior, especially toward strangers. And in many of you I have more than once found (what you called, “being wise as serpents”) much subtlety, much evasion and disguise, much guile and dissimulation.

You appeared to be what you were not, or not to be what you were. You so studied “to become all things to all men,” as to take the color and shape of any that were near you. So that your practice was indeed no proof of your judgment; but only an indication of your design, nulli laedere os; and of your conformity to that (not scriptural) maxim, Sinere mundum vadere ut vult: Nam vult vadere.⁶

I reply,

1. If this be all you mean, why do you not say so explicitly to all men?

2. Whether this be all, let any reasonable man judge, when he has read what is here subjoined.]

This objection then stands in fall force, the fact alleged being rather defended than denied.

The joining in worldly diversions in order to do good, (another charge which cannot be denied,) I think would admit of the same defense, viz., “That there are other things as bad.”]

What miserable work is here! Because trade relates to the Magistrate, am I not to consider whether my trade be innocent or sinful? Then, the keeper of a Venetian brothel is clear. The Magistrate shall answer for him to God!]

5. Secondly, With regard to that faith through which we are saved, I have heard many of you say, “A man may have justifying faith and not know it.” Others of you, who are now in England, (particularly Mr. Molther,) I have heard affirm,⁷ that there is no such thing as weak faith; that there are no degrees in faith; that there is no justifying faith, where there is ever any doubt; that there is no justifying faith without the plerophory of faith, the clear, abiding witness of the Spirit; that there is no justifying faith, where there is not, in the full, proper sense, a new or clean heart; and that those who have not these two gifts, are only awakened, not justified.

6. Thirdly, As to the way to faith, here are many among us, whom some of your brethren have advised (what it is not to be supposed they would as yet speak to me, or in their public preaching)⁸ not to use those ordinances which our Church terms “means of grace,” till they have such a faith as implies a clean heart, and excludes all possibility of doubting. They have advised them, till then, not to search the Scriptures, not to pray, not to communicate; and have often affirmed, that to do these things, is seeking salvation by works; and that till these works are laid aside, no man can receive faith; for, “No man,” say they, “can do these things without trusting in them: If he does not trust in them, why does he do them?”

7. To those who answered, “It is our duty to use the ordinances of God,” they replied, “There are no ordinances of Christ, the use of which is now bound upon Christians as a duty, or which we are commanded to use. As to those you mention in particular, (viz., prayer, communicating, and searching the Scripture,) if a man have faith, he need not; if he have not, he must not use them. A believer may use them, though not as enjoined; but an unbeliever (as before defined) may not.”

8. To those who answered, “I hope God will through these means convey his grace to my soul,” they replied, “There is no such thing as means of grace; Christ has not ordained any such in his Church. But if there were, they are nothing to you; for you are dead; you have no faith; and you cannot work while you are dead. Therefore, let these things alone till you have faith.”

9. And some of our English brethren, who are joined with yours, have said openly, “You will never have faith till you leave running about to church and sacrament, and societies.” Another of them has said, (in his public expounding,) “As many go to hell by praying as by thieving.” Another, “I knew one, who, leaning over the back of a chair, received a great gift. But he must kneel down to give God thanks: So he lost it immediately. And I know not whether he will ever have it again.” And yet another, “You have lost your first joy: Therefore you pray: That is the devil. You read the Bible: That is the devil. You communicate: That is the devil.”

10. Let not any of you, my brethren, say, “We are not chargeable with what they speak.” Indeed you are: For you can hinder it, if you will. Therefore, if you do not, it must be charged upon you. If you do not use the power which is in your hands, and thereby prevent their speaking thus, you do, in effect, speak thus yourselves. You make their words your own; and are, accordingly, chargeable with every ill consequence which may flow therefrom.

11. Fourthly, With regard to your Church,⁹ you greatly, yea, above measure, exalt yourselves and despise others.

“The Lord has such a peculiar hand in the several constitutions of religion, that one ought to respect every one of them.” I cannot possibly: I cannot respect, either the Jewish (as it is now) or the Roman religion. You add, “A Church (I will not examine whether there are any in this present age, or whether there is no other beside ours) is, a congregation of sinners who have obtained forgiveness of sins. That such a congregation should be in an error, cannot easily happen.”

I find no reason, therefore, to retreat any thing which is advanced on this or any of the following heads.]

I have scarce heard one Moravian brother, in my life, own his Church to be wrong in any thing.

I have scarce heard any of you (I think not one in England) own himself to be wrong in any thing.

Many of you I have heard speak of your Church, as if it were infallible; or, so led by the Spirit, that it was not possible for it to err in any thing. Some of you have set it up (as indeed you ought to do, if it be infallible) as the judge of all the earth, of all persons (as well as doctrines) therein: And you have accordingly passed sentence upon them at once, by their agreement or disagreement with your Church.

Some of you have said, that there is no true church on earth but yours; yea, that there are no true Christians out of it. And your own members you require to have implicit faith in her decisions, and to pay implicit obedience to her directions.

12. Fifthly, You receive not the ancient, but the modern Mystics, as the best interpreters of Scripture: And in conformity to these, you mix much of man’s wisdom with the wisdom of God: You greatly refine the plain religion taught by the letter of Holy Writ, and philosophize on almost every part of it, to accommodate it to the Mystic theory. Hence you talk much, in a manner wholly unsupported by Scripture, against mixing nature with grace, against imagination, and concerning the animal spirits, mimicking the power of the Holy Ghost. Hence your brethren zealously caution us against animal joy, against natural love of one another, and against selfish love of God; against which (or any of them) there is no one caution in all the Bible. And they have, in truth, greatly lessened, and had well-nigh destroyed, brotherly love from among us.

13. In conformity to the Mystics, you likewise greatly check joy in the Holy Ghost, by such cautions against sensible comforts, as have no tittle of Scripture to support them. Hence also your brethren here damp the zeal of babes in Christ, talking much of false zeal, forbidding them to declare what God hath done for their souls, even when their hearts burn within them to declare it, and comparing those to uncorked bottles, who simply and artlessly speak of the ability which God giveth.

14. Hence, Lastly, it is, that you undervalue good works, (especially works of outward mercy,) never publicly insisting on the necessity of them, nor declaring their weight and excellency. Hence, when some of your brethren have spoken of them, they put them on a wrong foot; viz., “If you find yourself moved, if your heart is free to it, then reprove, exhort, relieve.” By this means you wholly avoid the taking up your cross, in order to do good; and also substitute an uncertain, precarious inward motion, in the place of the plain written word. Nay, one of your members has said of good works in general, (whether works of piety or of charity,) “A believer is no more obliged to do these works of the Law, than a subject of the King of England is obliged to obey the laws of the King of France.”

15. My brethren, whether ye will hear, or whether ye will forbear, I have now delivered my own soul. And this I have chosen to do in an artless manner, that if any thing should come home to your hearts, the effect might evidently flow, not from the wisdom of man, but from the power of God.

August 8, 1740.

Thus have I declared, and in the plainest manner I can, the real controversy between us and the Moravian brethren; an unpleasing task, which I have delayed, at least, as long as I could with a clear conscience. But I am constrained at length nakedly to speak the thing as it is, that I may not hinder the work of God.

I am very sensible of the objection which has so often been made, viz., “You are inconsistent with yourself. You did tenderly love, highly esteem, and zealously recommend these very men: And now you do not love or esteem them at all. You not only do not recommend them, but are bitter against them; nay, and rail at them, before all the world.” This is partly true and partly false. That the whole case may be better understood, it will be needful to give a short account of what has occurred between us from the beginning.

My first acquaintance with the Moravian brethren began in my voyage to Georgia. Being then with many of them in the same ship, I narrowly observed their whole behavior. And I greatly approved of all I saw. Therefore I unbosomed myself to them without reserve.

From February 14, 1735, to December 2, 1737, being with them (except when I went to Frederica or Carolina) twice or thrice everyday, I loved and esteemed them more and more. Yet a few things I could not approve of. These I mentioned to them from time to time, and then commended the cause to God.

In February following I met with Peter Bohler. My heart clave to him as soon as he spoke. And the more we conversed, so much the more did I esteem both him and all the Moravian Church: So that I had no rest in my spirit till I executed the design which I had formed long before: Till, after a short stay in Holland, I hastened forward, first to Marienborne, and then to Hernhuth.

In September, 1738, soon after my return to England, I began the following letter to the Moravian Church. But being fearful of trusting my own judgment, I determined to wait yet a little longer, and so laid it by unfinished: —

“My Dear Brethren,

“I CANNOT but rejoice in your steadfast faith, in your love to our blessed Redeemer, your deadness to the world; your meekness, temperance, chastity, and love of one another. I greatly approve of your Conferences and lands; of your method of instructing children; and, in general, of your great care of the souls committed to your charge.

“But of some other things I stand in doubt, which I will mention in love and meekness. And I wish that, in order to remove those doubts, you would on each of those heads, First, Plainly answer, whether the fact be as I suppose; and, if so, Secondly, Consider whether it be right.

“Do you not wholly neglect joint fasting?

“Is not the Count all in all? Are not the rest mere shadows; calling him Rabbi; almost implicitly both believing and obeying him? “Is there not something of levity in your behavior? Are you, in general, serious enough?

“Are you zealous and watchful to redeem time? Do you not sometimes fall into trifling conversation?

“Do you not magnify your own Church too much?

“Do you believe any who are not of it to be in Gospel liberty? “Are you not straitened in your love? Do you love your enemies and wicked men as yourselves?

“Do you not mix human wisdom with divine; joining worldly prudence to heavenly?

“Do you not use cunning, guile, or dissimulation in many cases? “Are you not of a close, dark, reserved temper and behavior? “Is not the spirit of secrecy the spirit of your community? “Have you that childlike openness, frankness, and plainness of speech, so manifest to all in the Apostles and first Christians?” It may easily be seen that my objections, then, were nearly, the same as now. Yet I cannot say my affection was lessened at all, till after September, 1739, when certain men among us began to trouble their brethren, and subvert their souls. However, I cleared the Moravians still, and laid the whole blame on our English brethren.

But from November 1st, I could not but see (unwilling as I was to see them) more and more things which I could in no wise reconcile with the Gospel of Christ. And these I have set down with all simplicity, as they occurred in order of time: Believing myself indispensably obliged so to do, both in duty to God and man.

Yet do I this, because I love them not? God knoweth; yea, and in part I esteem them still: Because I verily believe, they have a sincere desire to serve God; because many of them have tasted of his love, and some retain it in simplicity; because they love one another; because they have so much of the truth of the Gospel, and so far abstain from outward sin; and, lastly, because their discipline is, in most respects, so truly excellent. “But why then are you bitter against them?” I do not know that I am. Let the impartial reader judge. And if any bitter word has escaped my notice, I here utterly retract it. “But do not you rail at them?” I hope not. God forbid that I should rail at a Turk, infidel, or heretic. To one who advanced the most dangerous error, I must say no more than, “The Lord rebuke thee.” But I would point out what those errors were; and, I trust, in the spirit of meekness.

In this spirit, my brethren, I have read, and endeavored to consider, all the books you have published in England, that I might inform myself whether, on farther consideration, you had retracted the errors which were advanced before. But it does by no means appear that you have retracted any of them: For, waiving the odd and affected phrases therein; the weak, mean, silly, childish expressions; the crude, confused, and indigested notions; the whims, unsupported either by Scripture or sound reason; yea, waiving those assertions which, though contrary to Scripture and matter of fact, are, however, of no importance; those three grand errors run through almost all those books, viz., Universal Salvation, Antinomianism, and a kind of new-reformed Quietism.

1. Can Universal Salvation be more explicitly asserted than it is in these words? — “By this his name all can and shall obtain life and salvation.” (Sixteen Discourses, p. 30.) This must include all men, at least; and may include all devils too.

Again, “The name of the wicked will not be so much as mentioned on the great day.” (Seven Discourses, p. 22.) And if they are not so much as mentioned, they cannot be condescend.

2. How can Antinomianism,¹⁰ that is, making void the Law through faith, be more expressly taught than it is in these words? —

“To believe certainly, that Christ suffered death for us: This is the true means to be saved at once:

“We want no more. For the history of Jesus coming into the world, ‘is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth;’ the bare historical knowledge of this.” (Sixteen Discourses, p. 57.) “There is but one duty, which is that of believing.” (Ibid., p. 193.) “From any demand of the Law, no man is obliged now to go one step, to give away one farthing, to eat or omit one morsel.” (Seven Discourses, p. 11.)

“What did our Lord do with the Law? He abolished it.” (Ibid., p. 33.) “Here one may think, — This is a fine sort of Christianity, where nothing good is commanded, and nothing bad is forbid. But thus it is.” (Ibid., p. 34.)

“So one ought to speak now. All commands and prohibitions are unfit for our times.” (Ibid.)

3. Is not the very essence of Quietism (though in a new shape) contained in these words? —

“The whole matter lies in this, that we should suffer ourselves to be relieved.” (Sixteen Discourses, p. 17.)

“One must do nothing, but quietly attend the voice of the Lord.” (Ibid., p. 29.)

“To tell men who have not experienced the power of grace, what they should do, and how they ought to behave, is as if you should send a lame man upon an errand.” (Ibid., p. 70.)

“The beginning is not to be made with doing what our Savior has commanded. For whosoever will begin with doing, when he is dead, he can do nothing at all; but whatever he doeth in his own activity, is but a cobweb; that is, good for nothing.” (Ibid., pp. 72, 81.) “As soon as we remain passive before him as the wood which a table is to be made from, then something comes of us.” (Seven Discourses, p. 22.) O my brethren, let me conjure you yet again, in the name of our common Lord, “if there be any consolation of love, if any bowels and mercies,” remove “the fly” out of “the pot of ointment;” separate “the precious from the vile!” Review, I beseech you, your whole work, and see if Satan hath gained no advantage over you. “Very excellent things” have been “spoken of thee, O thou city of God.” But may not “He which hath the sharp sword with two edges” say, Yet, “I have a few things against thee?” O that ye would repent of these, that ye might be “a glorious Church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing.”

Three things, above all, permit me, even me, to press upon you, with all the earnestness of love.

First, With regard to your doctrine, that ye purge out from among you the leaven of Antinomianism, wherewith you are so deeply infected, and no longer “make void the Law through faith.”

Secondly, With regard to your discipline, that ye “call no man Rabbi, Master,” Lord of your faith. “upon earth.” Subordination, I know, is needful; and I can show you such a subordination, as in fact answers all Christian purposes, and is yet as widely distant from that among you, as the heavens are from the earth.

Thirdly, With regard to your practice, that ye renounce all craft, cunning, subtlety, dissimulation; wisdom, falsely so called; that ye put away all disguise, all guile out of your mouth; that in all “simplicity and godly sincerity” ye “have your conversation in this world;” that we use “great plainness of speech” to all, whatever ye suffer thereby; seeking only, “by manifestation of the truth,” to “commend” yourselves “to every man’s conscience in the sight of God.”

June 24, 1744.

AN EXTRACT

OF THE

REV. MR. JOHN WESLEY’S

JOURNAL

FROM SEPTEMBER 3, 1741, TO OCTOBER 27, 1743.

WES_WW01.PDF, p. 348

Observing some who were beginning to use their liberty as a cloak for licentiousness, I enforced, in the morning, those words of St. Paul, (worthy to be written in the heart of every believer,) “All things are lawful for me; but all things are not expedient;” and, in the evening, that necessary advice of our Lord, “That men ought always to pray, and not to faint.”

WES_WW01.PDF, p. 364

I visited a young man in St. Thomas’s Hospital, who, in strong pain, was praising God continually. At the desire of many of the patients, I spent a short time with them in exhortation and prayer. O what a harvest might there be, if any lover of souls, who has time upon his hands, would constantly attend these places of distress, and, with tenderness and meekness of wisdom, instruct and exhort those on whom God has laid his hands, to know and improve the day of their visitation!

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I expounded in Grayhound-Lane, Whitechapel, part of the one hundred and seventh Psalm. And they did rejoice whom “the Lord had redeemed, and delivered from the hand of the enemy.”

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I was greatly comforted by one whom God had lifted up from the gates of death, and who was continually telling, with tears of joy, what God had done for his soul.

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I met about two hundred persons, with whom severally I had talked the week before, at the French chapel, in Hermitage-Street, Wapping, where they gladly joined in the Service of the Church, and particularly in the Lord’s Supper, at which Mr. Hall assisted. It was more than two years after this, that he began so vehemently to declaim against my brother and me, as “bigots to the Church, and those carnal ordinances,” as he loved to term them.

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I buried the only child of a tender parent, who, having soon finished her course, after a short sickness, went to Him her soul loved, in the fifteenth year of her age.

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I preached in Charles-Square, Hoxton, on these solemn words, “This is life eternal, to know thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent.” I trust God blessed his word. The scoffers stood abashed, and opened not their mouth.

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I set out, and the next evening met my brother at Bristol, with Mr. Jones, of Fonmon Castle, in Wales; now convinced of the truth as it is in Jesus, and laboring with his might to redeem the time he had lost, to make his calling sure, and to lay hold on eternal life.

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In the evening we went to Kingswood. The house was filled from end to end. And we continued in ministering the word of God, and in prayer and praise, till the morning.

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I expounded at Kingswood, (morning and afternoon,) at Bristol, and at Baptist-Mills, the message of God to the Church of Ephesus, particularly that way of recovering our first love, which God hath prescribed, and not man: “Remember from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works.”

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I was pressed to visit Nicholas Palmer, one who had separated from us, and behaved with great bitterness, till God laid his hand upon him. He had sent for me several times, saying, he could not die in peace till he had seen me. I found him in great weakness of body and heaviness of spirit. We wrestled with God on his behalf; and our labor was not in vain: His soul was comforted; and, a few hours after, he quietly fell asleep.

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We set out for Wales; but missing our passage over the Seven in the morning, it was sun-set before we could get to Newport. We inquired there if we could hire a guide to Cardiff; but there was none to be had. A lad coming in quickly after, who was going (he said) to Lanissau, a little village two miles to the right of Cardiff, we resolved to go thither. At seven we set out; it rained pretty fast, and there being neither moon nor stars, we could neither see any road, nor one another, nor our own horses’ heads; but the promise of God did not fail; he gave his angels charge over us; and soon after ten we came safe to Mr. William’s house at Lanissan.

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We rode to Fonmon Castle. We found Mr. Jones’s daughter ill of the small-pox: But he could cheerfully leave her and all the rest in the hands of Him in whom he now believed. In the evening I preached at Cardiff, in the Shire-Hall, a large and convenient place, on, “God hath given unto us eternal life, and this life is in his Son.” There having been a feast in the town that day, I believed it needful to add a few words upon intemperance: And while I was saying, “As for you, drunkards, you have no part in this life; you abide in death; you choose death and hell;” a man cried out vehemently, “I am one; and thither I am going.” But I trust God at that hour began to show him and others “a more excellent way.”

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About noon we came to Ponty-Pool. A Clergyman stopped me in the first street; a few more found me out soon after, whose love I did not find to be cooled at all by the bitter adversaries who had been among them. True pains had been taken to set them against my brother and me, by men who “know not what manner of spirit” they “are of.” But instead of disputing, we betook ourselves to prayer; and all our hearts were knit together as at the first.

In the afternoon we came to Abergavenny. Those who are bitter of spirit have been here also, yet Mrs. James (now Mrs. Whitefield) received us gladly, as she had done aforetime. But we could not procure even two or three to join with us in the evening beside those of her own household.

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I had an unexpected opportunity of receiving the holy communion. In the afternoon we had a plain, useful sermon, on the Pharisee and the Publican praying in the temple; which I explained at large in the evening, to the best dressed congregation I have ever yet seen in Wales. Two persons came to me afterwards, who were, it seemed, convinced of sin, and groaning for deliverance.

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I preached in the morning at Ponty-Pool, to a small but deeply-attentive Congregation. Mr. Price conducted us from thence to his house at Watford. After resting here an hour, we hastened on, and came to Fonmon, where I explained and enforced those words, “What must I do to be saved?” Many seemed quite amazed, while I showed them the nature of salvation, and the Gospel way of attaining it.

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I read Prayers and preached in Porth-Kerry church. My text was, “By grace are ye saved through faith.” In the evening, at Cardiff, I expounded Zechariah 4:7: “Who art thou, O great mountain? Before Zerubbabel thou shalt become a plain.” The next morning we set out, and in the evening praised God with our brethren in Bristol.

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I dined with C—— T——, greatly praising God for having done his own wise and holy will, in taking away “the desire of his eyes.” In the evening I preached on, “Looking unto Jesus;” and many were filled with consolation.

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The same Spirit helped our infirmities at the hour of intercession; and again, at Kingswood, in the evening. I was just laid down, when one came and told me, Howel Harris desired to speak with me at Bristol, being just come from London, and having appointed to set out for Wales at three in the morning. I went, and found him with Mr. Humphreys and Mr. S——. They immediately fell upon their favorite subject; on which when we had disputed two hours, and were just where we were at first, I begged we might exchange controversy for prayer. We did so, and then parted in much love, about two in the morning.

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His journey being deferred till Monday, H. Harris came to me at the new room. He said, as to the decree of reprobation, he renounced and utterly abhorred it. And as to the not falling from grace,

1. He believed that it ought not to be mentioned to the unjustified, or to any that were slack and careless, much less that lived in sin; but only to the earnest and disconsolate mourners.

2. He did himself believe it was possible for one to fall away who had been “enlightened” with some knowledge of God, who had “tasted of the heavenly gift, and been made partaker of the Holy Ghost;” and wished we could all agree to keep close, in the controverted points, to the very words of Holy Writ.

3. That he accounted no man so justified as not to fall, till he had a thorough, abiding hatred to all sin, and a continual hunger and thirst after all righteousness. Blessed be thou of the Lord, thou man of peace! Still follow after peace and holiness.

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I was preparing for another journey to Wales, which I had designed to begin on Friday; when I received a message from H. Harris, desiring me to set out immediately, and meet him near the New-Passage. I accordingly set out at noon; but, being obliged to wait at the water-side, did not reach Will-Creek (the place he had appointed for our meeting) till an hour or two after night. But this was soon enough; for he had not been there; nor could we hear any thing of him: So we went back to Mather, and thence in the morning to Lanmarton, a village two miles off, where we heard Mr. Daniel Rowlands was to be, and whom accordingly we found there. Evil-surmisings presently vanished away, and our hearts were knit together in love. We rode together to Machan, (five miles beyond Newport,) which we reached about twelve o’clock. In an hour after H. Harris came, and many of his friends from distant parts. We had no dispute of any kind; but the spirit of peace and love was in the midst of us. At three we went to church. There was a vast congregation, though at only a few hours’ warning. After Prayers, I preached on those words in the Second Lesson, “The life which I now live I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.” Mr. Rowlands then preached in Welsh, on Matthew 28:5: “Fear not ye; for ye seek Jesus, which was crucified.”

We rode afterwards to St. Bride’s in the Moors; where Mr. Rowlands preached again. Here we were met by Mr. Humphreys and Thomas Bissicks, of Kingswood. About eleven a few of us retired, in order to provoke one another to love, and to good works. But T. Bissicks immediately introduced the dispute, and others seconded him. This H. Harris and Mr. Rowlands strongly withstood; but finding it profited nothing, Mr. Rowlands soon withdrew. H. Harris kept them at a bay till about one o’clock in the morning: I then left them and Capt. T. together. About three they left off just where they began.

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Going to a neighboring house, I found Mr. H. and T. Bissicks tearing open the sore with all their might. On my coming in, all was hushed; but Mrs. James, of Abergavenny, (a woman of candor and humanity,) insisted that those things should be said to my face. There followed a lame piece of work: But although the accusations brought were easily answered, yet I found they left a soreness on many spirits. When H. Harris heard of what had passed, he hated to stand in the gap once more; and with tears besought them all “to follow after the things that make for peace;” and God blessed the healing words which he spoke; so that we parted in much love, being all determined to let controversy alone, and to preach “Jesus Christ, and him crucified.”

I preached at Cardiff at three, and about five set out thence for Fonmon Castle. Not withstanding the great darkness of the night, and our being unacquainted with the road, before eight we came safe to the congregation, which had been some time waiting for us.

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I rode to Wenvo. The church was thoroughly filled with attentive hearers, while I preached on those words, “Whom ye ignorantly worship, him declare I unto you.” In the afternoon I read Prayers and preached at Porth-Kerry: In the evening there was a great concourse of people at the Castle, to whom I strongly declared “the hope of righteousness which is through faith.”

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I preached once more at Porth-Kerry, and, in the afternoon, returned to Cardiff, and explained to a large congregation, “When they had nothing to pay, he frankly forgave them both.”

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At eleven I preached at the prison, on, “I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.” In the afternoon I was desired to meet one of the honorable women, whom I found a mere sinner, groaning under the mighty hand of God. About six, at Mr. W.’s desire, I preached once more on those words, “Whom ye ignorantly worship, him declare I unto you.”

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I set out soon after preaching, and, about nine, came to Newport. A Clergyman, soon after I was set down, came into the next room, and asked aloud, with a tone unusually sharp, where those vagabond fellows were. Capt. T., without any ceremony, took him in hand; but he soon quitted the field, and walked out of the house. Just as I was taking horse, he returned, and said, “Sir, I am afraid you are in a wrong way; but if you are right, I pray God to be with you, and prosper your undertakings.”

About one I came to Callicut, and preached to a small, attentive company of people, on, “Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness; for they shall be filled.” Between seven and eight we reached Bristol.

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I called upon Edward W——, who had been ill for several days. I found him in deep despair. Since he had left off prayer, “all the waves and storms were gone over him.” We cried unto God, and his soul revived. A little light shone upon him, and, just as we sung, — Be thou his strength and righteousness,

His Jesus and his all;

his spirit returned to God.

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I saw several others who were ill of the same distemper. Surely our Lord will do much work by this sickness. I do not find that it comes to any house without leaving a blessing behind it. In the evening I went to Kingswood, and found Ann Steed also praising God in the fires, and testifying that all her weakness and pain wrought together for good.

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I visited more of the sick, both in Kingswood and Bristol; and it was pleasant work; for I found none of them “sorrowing as men without hope.” At six I expounded, “God is light, and in him is no darkness at all;” and his light broke in upon us in such a manner, that we were even lost in praise and thanksgiving.

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Editorial note: The supplied edition prints the heading “Sun. 26. —”. The independent 1872 Jackson edition, volume 1, reads “Sun. 25” (PDF page 370). The entry is indexed as 1741-10-25 following that printed heading and the surrounding dated entries. The supplied heading and journal prose are retained. John Wesley, Works, Jackson edition (1872), volume 1, PDF page 370.

After the sacrament at All-Saints, I took horse for Kingswood; but before I came to Lawrence-Hill, my horse fell, and attempting to rise again, fell down upon me. One or two women ran out of a neighboring house, and when I rose, helped me in. I adore the wisdom of God. In this house were three persons who began to run well, but Satan had hindered them: But they resolved to set out again; and not one of them has looked back since.

Notwithstanding this delay, I got to Kingswood by two. The words God enabled me to speak there, and afterwards at Bristol, (so I must express myself still, for I dare not ascribe them to my own wisdom,) were as a hammer and a flame; and the same blessing we found at the meeting of the society; but more abundantly at the love-feast which followed. I remember nothing like it for many months. A cry was heard from one end of the congregation to the other; not of grief, but of overflowing joy and love. “O continue forth thy loving-kindness unto them that know thee; and thy righteousness unto them that are true of heart!”

The great comfort I found, both in public and private, almost everyday of the ensuing, week, I apprehend, was to prepare me for what followed: A short account of which I sent to London soon after, in a letter, the copy of which I have subjoined; although I am sensible there are several circumstances therein which some may set down for mere enthusiasm and extravagance.

“DEAR BROTHER,

“ALL last week I found hanging upon me the effects of a violent cold I had contracted in Wales: Not, I think, (as Mr. Turner and Walcam supposed,) by lying in a damp bed at St. Bride’s; but rather by riding continually in the cold and wet nights, and preaching immediately after. But I believed it would pass off, and so took little notice of it till Friday morning. I then found myself exceeding sick: And as I walked to Baptist-Mills, (to pray with Susanna Basil, who was ill of a fever,) felt the wind pierce me, as it were, through. At my return I found myself something better: Only I could not eat any thing at all. Yet I felt no want of strength at the hour of intercession, nor at six in the evening, while I was opening and applying those words, ‘Sun, stand thou still in Gibeon; and thou, moon, in the valley of Ajalon.’ I was afterwards refreshed, and slept well: So that I apprehended no farther disorder; but rose in the morning as usual, and declared, with a strong voice and enlarged heart, ‘Neither circumcision availeth any thing, nor uncircumcision, but faith that worketh by love.’ About two in the afternoon, just as I was set down to dinner, a shivering came upon me, and a little pain in my back: But no sickness at all, so that I eat a little; and then, growing warm, went to see some that were sick. Finding myself worse about four, I would willingly have lain down. But having promised to see Mrs. G——, who had been out of order for some days, I went thither first, and thence to Weaver’s Hall. A man gave me a token for good as I went along, ‘Ay,’ said he, ‘he will be a martyr too by and by.’ The scripture I enforced was, ‘My little children, these things I write unto you, that ye sin not. But if any man sin, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous.’ I found no want either of inward or outward strength. But afterwards finding my fever increased, I called on Dr. Middleton. By his advice I went home and took my bed: A strange thing to me who had not kept my bed a day (for five and thirty years) ever since I had the small-pox. I immediately fell into a profuse sweat, which continued till one or two in the morning. God then gave me refreshing sleep, and afterwards such tranquillity of mind, that this day, Sunday, NOVEMBER 1, seemed the shortest day to me I had ever known in my life.

“I think a little circumstance ought not to be omitted, although I know there may be an ill construction put upon it. Those words were how so strongly impressed upon my mind, that for a considerable time I could not put them out of my thoughts, ‘Blessed is the man that provideth for the poor and needy: The Lord shall deliver him in the time of trouble. The Lord shall comfort him when he lieth sick upon his bed: Make thou all his bed in his sickness.’

“On Sunday night likewise I slept well, and was easy all Monday morning. But about three in the afternoon the shivering returned much more violent than before. It continued till I was put to bed. I was then immediately as in a fiery furnace. In a little space I began sweating: But the sweating seemed to increase rather than allay the burning heat. Thus I remained, till about eight o’clock; when I suddenly awaked out of a kind of doze, in such a sort of disorder (whether of body or mind, or both) as I know not how to describe. My heart and lungs, and all that was within me, and my soul too, seemed to be in perfect uproar. But I cried unto the Lord in my trouble, and he delivered me out of my distress.

“I continued in a moderate sweat till near midnight, and then slept pretty well till morning. On Tuesday, November 3, about noon I was removed to Mr. Hooper’s. Here I enjoyed a blessed calm for several hours, the fit not returning till six in the evening: And then in such a manner as I never heard or read of I had a quick pulse, attended with violent heat; but no pain, either in my head, or back, or limbs; no sickness, no stitch, no thirst. Surely God is a present help in time of trouble. And he does ‘make all’ my ‘bed in’ my ‘sickness.’

“Wed. 4. — Many of our brethren agreed to seek God today by fasting and prayer. About twelve my fever began to rage. At two I dozed a little, and suddenly awaked in such a disorder (only more violent) as that on Monday. The silver cord appeared to be just then loosing, and the wheel breaking at the cistern. The blood whirled to and fro, as if it would immediately force its way through all its vessels, especially in the breast: And excessive burning heat parched up my whole body, both within and without. About three, in a moment the commotion ceased, the heat was over, and the pain gone. Soon after it made another attack; but not near so violent as the former. This lasted till half-past four, and then vanished away at once. I grew better and better till nine: Then I fell asleep, and scarce awaked at all till morning.

“Thur. 5. — The noisy joy of the people in the streets did not agree with me very well; though I am afraid it disordered their poor souls much more than it did my body. About five in the evening my cough returned, and soon after, the heat and other symptoms; but with this remarkable circumstance, that for fourteen or fifteen hours following, I had more or less sleep in every hour. This was one cause why I was never light headed at all, but had the use of my understanding, from the first hour of my illness to the last, as fully as when in perfect health.

“Fri. 6. — Between ten and twelve the main shock began. I can give but a faint account of this, not for want of memory, but of words. I felt in my body nothing but storm and tempest, hail-stones and coals of fire. But I do not remember that I felt any fear, (such was the mercy of God!) nor any murmuring. And yet I found but a dull, heavy kind of patience, which I knew was not what it ought to be. The fever came rushing upon me as a lion, ready to break all my bones in pieces. My body grew weaker every moment; but I did not feel my soul put on strength. Then it came into my mind, ‘Be still, and see the salvation of the Lord. I will not stir hand or foot; but let him do with me what is good in his own eyes.’ At once my heart was at ease. ‘My mouth was filled with laughter, and my tongue with joy.’ My eyes overflowed with tears, and I began to sing aloud. One who stood by said, ‘Now he is light headed.’ I told her, ‘O no; I am not light-headed; but I am praising God; God is come to my help, and pain is nothing; glory be to God on high!’ I now found why it was not expedient for me to recover my health sooner: Because then I should have lost this experimental proof, how little every thing is which can befall the body, so long as God carries the soul aloft, as it were on the wings of an eagle. “An hour after, I had one more grapple with the enemy, Who then seemed to collect all his strength. I essayed to shake myself, and praise God as before, but I was not able; the power was departed from me. I was shorn of my strength, and became weak and like another man. Then I said, ‘Yet here I hold; lo, I come to bear thy will, O God.’ Immediately he returned to my soul, and lifted up the light of his countenance. And I felt, He rideth easily enough, whom the grace of God carrieth.’” I supposed the fit was now over, it being about five in the afternoon, and began to compose myself for sleep; when I felt first a chill, and then a burning all over, attended with such an universal faintness, and weariness, and utter loss of strength, as if the whole frame of nature had been dissolved. Just then my nurse, I know not why, took me out of bed, and placed me in a chair. Presently a purging began, which I believe saved my life. I grew easier from that hour, and had such a night’s rest as I have not had before, since it pleased God to lay his hand upon me.”

From Saturday, 7, to Sunday, 15, I found my strength gradually increasing, and was able to read Turretin’s “History of the Church,” (a dry, heavy, barren treatise,) and the Life of that truly good and great man, Mr. Philip Henry. On Monday and Tuesday I read over the “Life of Mr. Matthew Henry,” — a man not to be despised, either as a scholar or a Christian, though, I think, not equal to his father. On Wednesday I read over once again “Theoloria Germanica.” O how was it, that I could ever so admire the affected obscurity of this unscriptural writer! Glory be to God, that I now prefer the plain Apostles and Prophets, before him and all his Mystic followers.

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I read again, with great surprise, part of the “Ecclesiastical History of Eusebius.” But so weak, credulous, thoroughly-injudicious a writer, have I seldom found.

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I began Mr. Laval’s “History of the reformed Churches in France;” full of the most amazing instances of the wickedness of men, and of the goodness and power of God. About noon, the next day, I went out in a coach as far as the school in Kingswood; where one of the mistresses lay (as was believed) near death, having found no help from all the medicines she had taken. We determined to try one remedy more; so we poured out our souls in prayer to God. From that hour she began to recover strength, and in a few days was out of danger.

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Being not suffered to go to church as yet, I communicated at home. I was advised to stay at home sometime longer; but I could not apprehend it necessary: And therefore, on Monday, 23, went to the new-room, where we praised God for all his mercies. And I expounded, for about an hour, (without any faintness or weariness,) on, “What reward shall I give unto the Lord for all the benefits that he hath done unto me? I will receive the cup of salvation, and call upon the name of the Lord.” I preached once everyday this week, and found no inconvenience by it.

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I thought I might go a little farther. So I preached both at Kingswood and at Bristol; and afterwards spent near an hour with the society, and about two hours at the love-feast. But my body could not yet keep pace with my mind. I had another fit of my fever the next day; but it lasted not long, and I continued slowly to regain my strength. On Thursday, DECEMBER 3, I was able to preach again, on, “By their fruits ye shall know them;” and Friday evening on, “Cast thy bread upon the waters, and after many days thou shalt find it again.”

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I preached on, “Trust ye in the Lord Jehovah, for in the Lord is everlasting strength.” I was showing, what cause we had to trust in the Captain of our salvation, when one in the midst of the room cried out, “Who was your captain the other day, when you hanged yourself? I know the man who saw you when you was cut down.” This wise story, it seems, had been diligently spread abroad, and cordially believed by many in Bristol. I desired they would make room for the man to come nearer. But the moment he saw the way open, he ran away with all possible speed, not so much as once looking behind him.

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God humbled us in the evening by the loss of more than thirty of our little company, who I was obliged to exclude, as no longer adorning the Gospel of Christ. I believed it best, openly to declare both their names and the reasons why they were excluded. We then all cried unto God, that this might be for their edification, and not for destruction.

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I went to Bath. I had often reasoned with myself concerning this place, “Hath God left himself without witness?” Did he never raise up such as might be shining lights, even in the midst of this sinful generation? Doubtless he has; but they are either gone “to the desert,” or hid under the bushel of prudence. Some of the most serious persons I have known at Bath are either solitary Christians, scarce known to each other, unless by name; or prudent Christians, as careful not to give offense, as if that were the unpardonable sin: And as zealous, to “keep their religion to themselves,” as they should be, to “let it shine before men.” I returned to Bristol the next day. In the evening one desired to speak with me. I perceived him to be in the utmost confusion, so that for awhile he could not speak. At length, he said, “I am he that interrupted you at the new-room, on Monday: I have had no rest since, day or night, nor could have till I had spoken to you. I hope you will forgive me, and that it will be a warning to me all the days of my life.”

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It being a hard frost, I walked over to Bath, and had a conversation of several hours with one who had lived above seventy, and studied divinity above thirty, years: Yet remission of sins was quite a new doctrine to him. But I trust God will write it on his heart. In the evening I took down the names of some who desired to strengthen each other’s hands in God. Thus “the bread” we have “cast upon the waters is found again after many days.”

I returned to Bristol the next day. Thursday, 17. We had a night of solemn joy, occasioned by the funeral of one of our brethren, who died with a hope full of immortality.

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Being disappointed of my horse, I set out on foot in the evening for Kingswood. I catched no cold, nor received any hurt, though it was very wet, and cold, and dark. Mr. Jones, of Fonmon, met me there; and we poured out our souls before God together. I found no weariness, till, a little before one, God gave me refreshing sleep.

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I preached once more at Bristol, on, “Little children, keep yourselves from idols;” immediately after which, I forced myself away from those to whom my heart was now more united than ever; and I believe their hearts were even as my heart. O what poor words are those: — “You abate the reverence and respect which the people owe to their Pastors!” Love is all in all; and all who are alive to God must pay this to every true Pastor: Wherever a flock is duly fed with the pure milk of the word, they will be ready (were it possible) to pluck out their eyes, and give them to those that are over them in the Lord.

I took coach on Monday, 21, and on Wednesday came to London.

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I found it was good for me to be here, particularly while I was preaching in the evening. The society afterwards met; but we scarce knew how to part, our hearts were so enlarged toward each other.

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The morning congregation was increased to above thrice the usual number, while I explained, “Grace be unto you, and peace, from God the Father, and from our Lord Jesus Christ.” At Long-Lane likewise, in the evening, I had a crowded audience, to whom I spoke from those words, “O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways past finding out.”

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After diligent inquiry made, I removed all those from the congregation of the faithful, whose behavior or spirit was not agreeable to the Gospel of Christ: Openly declaring the objections I had to each, that others might fear, and cry to God for them.

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By the unusual overflowing of peace and love to all, which I felt, I was inclined to believe some trial was at hand. At three in the afternoon my fever came; but, finding it was not violent, I would not break my word, and therefore went at four and committed to the earth the remains of one who had died in the Lord a few days before; neither could I refrain from exhorting the almost innumerable multitude of people, who were gathered together round her grave, to cry to God, that they might die the death of the righteous, and their last end be like hers. I then designed to lie down; but Sir John G—— coming, and sending to speak with me, I went to him, and from him into the pulpit, knowing God could renew my strength. I preached, according to her request, who was now with God, on those words with which her soul had been so refreshed a little before she went hence, after a long night of doubts and fears: “Thy sun shall no more go down, neither shall thy moon with draw itself. For the Lord shall be thine everlasting light, and the days of thy mourning shall be ended.” At the society which followed, many cried after God with a loud and bitter cry. About ten I left them, and committed myself into His hands, to do with me what seemed him good.

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